Monthly Archives: September 2010

banned from craigslist

I’m so proud! I’ve been banned from craigslist for promoting Two Girls. Yeah, we’re pretty risky.

For the last six months, I’ve been driving traffic to Two Girls via craigslist. Well, I might have broken a rule or two. You’re not supposed to post the same message in more than one city, but um, I might have done that once or twice. Ironically, that’s not what got me banned. What got me put in the deep freeze is that a person or persons in a very liberal San Francisco suburb which shall go unnamed, “flagged” me each time I posted to that community.

I know, I know, I shouldn’t have kept poking that hornet’s nest with a stick, but come on! So why did this uber-progressive community have a problem with Two Girls? Couldn’t have been the blog itself. If the purity police had bothered to click on the link I provided and actually read a blog entry by Two Girls, they would have seen that we are a spiritually positive, family-friendly place to hang out. But I don’t think they got that far. I think their cultural prejudice kicked in before they read even one sentence that Two Girls had to share. No, I think they based their bias on the name. Really?

Yep, Two Girls Take on Love has many implications. I don’t need to be specific, you know what I mean. K and I learned that early on, when reading stats on our admin page. You can actually see what kind of search words people plug into their browsers to find websites. Some of the phrases that people used that got them directed to TGTOL were downright nasty. Ick! Ick!

We were so creeped out by what people were looking for related to two girls, we actually lobbied WordPress to change the design of their admin pages. Well truthfully, it was K. She fired off a couple of rip-snorting emails that got the attention of the web masters, and they changed the design of the page so that we can “hide” or “show” the search engine reports. Nice!

Back to Two Girls Take On Love. It’s who we are, and we don’t apologize for it. Banned from craigslist?  Bring it. Love, C

My two cents: never apologize for your dazzling light!

♥♥♥

Ahh, craigslist, where anyone can post pretty much anything, except us. I think it’s hysterical.

When C and I first started Two girls it wasn’t even Two girls it was just us, wanting to do something meaningful together, wanting to share all we have learned along the way to where we are, and not really knowing how to do it and what it would be if we did it and who if anyone, would even care.

We basically started writing our phone conversations, or maybe just the idea of our conversations.  Then, once we had something, we didn’t really feel comfortable telling our friends about what we were doing, heck we didn’t even know what we were doing yet.  And I’m sorry, you could have the best friends in the world, which we both do, but how do you  explain that you are writing a blog about love, when you, a) don’t really know what you are doing and  b) some of your friends could argue that you are probably the last person who should be writing about love.

Once we had a few posts under our belts and we were feeling like something was happening here, we wanted to put it out there. C got the idea to toss it out to craigslist.  Awesome, we got responses, we got great  feedback, people seemed to love us and then the powers that be. . .well I guess they didn’t.

One of the most important things C and I have learned throughout this process is don’t push against what’s not working.  If something isn’t working there’s a reason, so go with it and be open to another way.  I think it’s human nature to try to fix something that is perceived to be broken. It was working and now it’s not, we gotta go back in time and see where it went wrong and get it right. You can do that I guess, but I’ve got about a thousand examples of that not working.

So back to craigslist, I think it was great, it served a purpose but now it’s time to move on.  We have found better more effective ways to promote and share our stories.  Could we go up against craigslist, fight for our right to say what we want to say?  We could, but it is just too much wasted energy, energy that could go toward something way more fun and productive.  xo-K

My two cents:   the sooner you come to peace with that one door closing, the faster the next door will open.

http://youtu.be/GKXKyAkk4Fs

Advertisements

Leave a comment

Filed under blogging, fate & destiny, Inspiration, law of attraction, pop culture

best friends forever

When I was in High School my best friend D was my partner in crime.  We got ourselves into all kinds of mayhem, we could plot and scheme our way into or out of anything. Harmless stuff really. Need to borrow a car?  Who cared if we were only fifteen and didn’t have a license? Not us.  Home way past curfew?  We could talk our way out of that.  Hell, we even convinced our counselor that we needed to skip fifth  period psychology every Friday, just ‘cuz.

If we needed to figure anything out, between the two of us we could do it, and do it brilliantly.  We felt like Lucy and Ethel, and of course we always had our Rickys and Freds waiting in the wings, scratching their heads but loving every minute of it.

There is something so wonderful about having a best friend  you can totally depend on,  someone who loves you unconditionally and is always there for you.  The keeper of your secrets and dreams.  I’ve been very lucky to have many best friends throughout my life.  I am an only child, so friends are probably more precious to me since I never had a sibling.  My friends where my family.

I’ve also had my share of boyfriends.   But I’ve never had a boyfriend who was a best friend. I guess I always thought  you had your friends and then you had your dates.  How many hours did the “girls” spend trying to figure out the “boys”?  Way too many. I never considered you could have a partner who was also your best friend.

The  first time I saw an example of this was at an Abraham-Hicks workshop.  It was clear to me that Esther and Jerry Hicks had something very special.  They are partners in crime for sure and they love working together, “being” together, and it’s obvious they really enjoy each other.  I love how they are together.

Last Sunday I was watching “Diners, Drive-ins, and Dives,” on the Food Network.   I wasn’t really paying much attention until I saw this couple.  They were driving across the country visiting as many of the “Dives” that Guy Fieri highlighted on the show as they could.  They were so cool, it was clear that they were enjoying what they were doing, and enjoying each other.  They seemed to be having so much fun, so in sync.  Like best friends. Then it hit me,  that’s what I want in a relationship!  xo-K

My two cents:  Once you recognize what you want you start to see more and more examples of it.

♥♥♥

Yeah, friends and lovers.  Sometimes they’re the same person, sometimes they’re not. During one of my most epic break-ups, mi amor cried and said he was losing his best friend. I don’t know what was sadder: the break-up, or that I couldn’t tell him I was losing my bf, too. Ouch to the nth.

Do we expect too much from our lovers? Sometimes, I think so. We have these ideas about who and what they should be and when they show us who they really are, we’re disappointed.  But I don’t think that the way to avoid being disappointed is to stop loving. Oh, heck no.  This tattered heart of mine will continue to beat for love until I’m wearing angel wings, and then some. The answer isn’t to shut down. The answer is perhaps, to love differently.

What we expect from love has evolved over time. The notion of marriage for love is pretty  new, historically speaking. Marriages used to be a business arrangement to secure countries, farms, goats, you name it. Marriage wasn’t about love, it was a transaction. If you got love in the bargain, bonus!  Now that I have become a woman of a certain age, I might even venture to suggest that much of what could be called romantic love is biology at work. I thought I loved my first husband, but now I wonder: was it my heart that was running the show, or my ovaries? Not that I didn’t love him, I did. But maybe not for the reasons I believed.

Best friends are simple. Love is tricky. As a girl, my grandmother fell in love with a boy who lived in a nearby town, but her parents had already chosen a husband for her, my grandfather. Many years later, after Grandpa passed, Grandma looked up her old beau. By then he was widowed too, and they married. In their twilight time, they finally got to express the love they had sparked fifty years earlier. Were they bf’s? I don’t know. But I do know that the initial love they felt had survived the passage of time.

I adore my friends. If my lover also happens to be my bf, I consider myself one lucky girl. Love, C

My two cents: Keep your friends close, your enemies closer, and your lover closest of all.

httpvh://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K4vQwrHZWWk

1 Comment

Filed under dating, Inspiration, love, relationships

what’s in it for me?

Yesterday, I had to run out to a winery to pick up a donation for this big fancy-pants fundraiser I’m planning. When I finally found the place high on a mountain top, it was a construction zone. I had two addresses for the winery, and the other one was exactly 20 miles away. For half a minute, I thought about tip-toeing through the hard hat zone to see if I was at the right place, but I dismissed the idea. I got back into my car and drove to the other location, only to be told that what I needed was back where I started. Sigh!

Going with the flow, going with your intuition always seems to work out best.  And when you don’t, it kind of bites you in the ass. Have you noticed?

Last weekend I was invited to dinner with a friend, and I almost opted out but then thought, what the heck, life is short, carpe diem. And wouldn’t you know, I sat across the dinner table from a woman whose company I’d been trying to make contact with, but without much luck. We were just casually talking and when I found out she was with Company X, I asked her if I could call her the next day, and of course she agreed.  So cool!

A couple of days ago, I had to dash to Macy’s at lunch and pick up some mascara. Yeah, why can’t I just wear the drug store brand? Anyway, I got to the cosmetics counter, and got my order ready, then the computer wouldn’t accept my card. So, Kat, my super-cool sales associate, placed a call. She was so sweet and apologetic about my “inconvenience” — and I was very aware that I was standing  at the intersection of amused and beotch, and could go either way. Long story short and about 3o minutes later, I learned that my account had been closed. What? Yeah, not by me, but whatever. The upside? I got a sack full of groovy cosmetic samples, Kat and I are now buddies, and she’s very excited about getting to know Two Girls.

You know, I could have got all righteous about the screw-up at the department store, but instead, I had fun with it. After all, no one lost a limb or a life, and I made a new friend.  Love, C

My two cents: Sometimes you need to leap first and ask questions later. Sometimes you just need to relax and ask for samples.

♥♥♥

I always ask for samples, so cute, perfect size to toss in your purse.  I just love getting free stuff.  A few months ago a friend from work and I decided we were going to get something free, everyday, just for fun. Every morning we would make the statement, I’m going to get something  free today.  Then we would let it go and go about our business.  It usually didn’t take long before a client brought in a coffee or a bottle of wine.  It didn’t have to be anything big, just free.  So much fun!

Just set an intention, let it go with no attachment to the outcome. Don’t worry about it not happening or all the ways it can’t happen, just toss it out there. . . and before you know it, there it is.  So cool.

There have been times that I thought I wanted something to happen,  then forgot about it completely until it showed up, just the way I had hoped it would.  This has happened the other way around too.   I wanted something soooo bad, thought about it constantly, thought I would die without it, and guess what?  It didn’t happen in the way I had planned, it played out differently –and much better.  Thank goodness.

I can’t tell you how many times I have been rushing off to work  and can’t find my keys for a few minutes. Aghh! So frustrating!  When I finally get in my car and on my way I find that had I left a few minutes earlier I would have been involved in the accident that I am now slowly driving past.  Seems like a stretch  to connect misplacing your keys with missing a traffic situation, but you can’t make this stuff up.  There is so much going on out there that we don’t know about , that we can’t understand.

I have come to the conclusion that there is something to be learned from everything that gets our attention.  And when something comes up over and over again. . .well, I try to take some time to ask my guides or my angels,  “what’s in this for me?”

Oh, and I never forget to say a little thank you for all my gifts.  xo-K

My two cents:  Be clear about what you want, but be flexible about how it manifests.


Leave a comment

Filed under affirmations, Inspiration, pop culture

slow down to speed up

For someone who doesn’t own a TV, I have a pretty good idea of what’s going on.  And I never watch the  “news!”  However, one of the funniest, smartest, sweetest new programs around is Modern Family. Love that show!

One of the characters is a goofy dad who is the biggest dork around, but he always manages to ‘get the job done.’ So, in one episode, the family is running around, trying to get out of the house and on a flight to Hawaii for a big family trip. Mom is going out of her mind trying to hurry everyone along while Dad is calmly walking at a snail’s pace, saying, “fast is slow and slow is fast.” And you know what? He’s right! When you try to push things, speed things up, you trip up and then end up having to repeat each step all over again. Sigh.

When things are going right in my life, doors open as if by magic. The right people show up. The right answers appear. Friendly helpful strangers seem to pop in just when I need them. I love it when that happens! Right now for instance, I’ve been seeing someone whom I really like. It’s new, and we’re probably moving slow by today’s standards.  We’re  playing it sort of old school, and its very sweet. Yeah, I’ve moved into these things faster in the past. . .and that didn’t really work out. Now I’m at the point where I’m not working so hard to “get there.” I’m just enjoying the process.

When someone wants to be with you, they are with you. There are no games, no power struggles. It just flows. Not long ago, I dated someone for a short time who insisted he was busy with his kids on the weekends. I know! Then, while having lunch with a friend, talking about how ‘distant’ this guy seemed, my friend asked how old the kids were. “They’re in their twenties,” I replied. “They’re in college.” Dear P looked at me like, you poor dumb thing. “Trust me,” she said. “He’s not hanging with those kids. At that age, those boys are not all about spending time with Dad.”  Hey! I tend to give parents the benefit of the doubt. . .in all circumstances. I’ve heard more than once, “you don’t have kids, so you can’t understand.”  And they’re right. I don’t always understand, but I do know this: when a relationship any relationship —is right, it’s simple. Love, C

My two cents: Trust that you’re exactly where you’re supposed to be. Always.

♥♥♥

I don’t know about you but when I feel the need to hurry things along, make things happen, it’s because I feel if I don’t it won’t happen.  When I feel anxious about something there is usually a reason.  Whenever you put crazy nervous energy behind something it usually doesn’t pan out, and it’s probably just as well.

When something is right, it’s right.  It takes on a life of it’s own and you don’t feel any need to make it do or be anything.  I have watched friends throughout the years chase after relationships trying to make this one be the one. Hey, I have done it myself.   Wanting so much to seal the deal, cross it off the list, get it over with and get on to other things.  Really?  That’s how you want your relationship to play out?  What is wrong with enjoying the journey,  watching it unfold, savoring it, enjoying every delicious moment?  Just askin.’

Here’s why I think we do this thing we do, it’s because on some level we know it’s not going to happen.  We know it’s not the job, the house, or the relationship for us. But, we don’t feel it’s really possible to get exactly what we want so we figure, close enough is good enough. Better snatch this one up before someone else who is close enough to it snatches it up first.  (I can’t believe I just said that).

We spend all this time and energy racing around trying to make things happen,  then we’re so surprised and disappointed when they don’t and we have to start all over from square one.  Could things go any slower?

So sometimes you have to stop. . .just stop, take a breath. . .and just know. . .whether it comes from what your Mother said, what your girlfriends said or some voice that you don’t even know said. .  .just have some faith in whatever. There is a divine plan, things are working out for you, so you don’t have to worry.  Aren’t you glad someone knows better than you?  Aren’t you glad someone has your back? xo-K

My two cents:  I am so grateful that when I am spinning out of control there is someone or something to show me the way.

1 Comment

Filed under dating, Inspiration

you probably think this blog is about you

Everyone loves Two Girls!!  I am shocked, amazed, awestruck, amused and most of all grateful.  C and I have always written from the heart, and we usually write about what is happening. . . right now.  That being said, everyone who comes in contact with us is potentially Two Girls material.  As much as we try to mix it up, people might come to the conclusion that  we are talking about them in our blog.  This has happen to me on more than one occasion.

Sometimes we talk about dating and relationships, and C, who btw,  in the past hadn’t  shared much of her personal info when she is dating someone new, is now much more open and lets  her dates know who she is and what she does, including the fact that she writes a blog. This is great, but sometimes  I think, don’t tell them… I want to write about them and now they will totally know we’re talking about them. That being said we  have to be a bit creative when we are telling our story as to not incriminate or hurt feelings.

I have heard from quite a few friends and fans of Two Girls when a post really resonated with them, that they were going through something and then read our most recent post and it was about just the thing they were working through.  I love when that happens.  See: we are all more alike than we are different.

We all want to love and be loved.  We all want health and prosperity for ourselves, our family, and our friends.  We have all dealt with heartache, loss, and disappointment. We have all been afraid.  Lost a job or a loved one.  Or maybe just had a crappy day.  Oh, and don’t get me started on Mercury Retrograde.  We all just want to be happy and have a joy filled life.

September has been a hard month.  There’s a lot going on energetically, it is a great time for releasing, so when stuff comes up for you (and it will), make sure you have someone to work through it with.  Oh, and if you want to be part of  Two Girls, we’d love to have you.  Leave us a comment. Maybe you have something to share that would be beneficial for others to hear.  xo-K

My two cents:  If you think this blog is about you, it is probably for you.

♥♥♥

Yeah, K and I have been working on these principles for a while.  We talk about this stuff for hours.  As time goes by it’s become more and more clear that: a) we’re kinda getting better at it even though we have a ways to go, and b) we  totally see these principles at work in our lives and the lives of those around us. Cool!

It’s so true: we need each other. Not just me and K — all of us. We need each other! Not just for sex and safety and survival, and all that primal stuff. We need each other so that we can see each other, see our own Divine spark reflected back in someone’s eyes.  My blog partner and I are mirrors for each other through the good, the bad, and the ugly. . .and then we blog about it.

Yeah, if you know us, chances are that you’ll show up on the “pages” of Two Girls. Not that you will recognize yourself, because that would just not be fair. When we have written about someone without disguise, they knew about it ahead of time and agreed to it.   I have already gone on record that as a writer, my style could be called voyeur. I watch. I watch people, I observe the world.  And then I tell stories.  I know for me, the best part of camping is certainly not the bugs and the dirt . . .it’s the stories around the campfire. Well, the stories and the s’mores and the stars above.

If you think that you see yourself in one of our stories, rest assured you’re not the only one. Are we psychic? Well yeah, sure. But more to the point, we are all sharing an experience here on this groovy little planet and as much as we sometimes think we are all alone, we are not. Do you remember as a teenager, going through some terribly painful initiation on the path to “growing up,”  and thinking what a freak you were, only to hear something, read something, share your story with a trusted friend, then realize that you weren’t alone? We are not alone. We’ve never been alone.

So are we writing about you? Maybe. But more importantly, does what we write mean something to you? That’s the question. Love, C

My two cents: the Divine in me sees the Divine in you and says: Namaste.

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mQZmCJUSC6g

1 Comment

Filed under blogging, Inspiration, relationships, self-care

just the facts, ma’am

I envy writers who can make things up. JK Rowling? A total goddess. She created a whole world that is so amazing, I wouldn’t even know where to start. And Stephenie Meyer? Genius. When it comes to writing, I am a voyeur. I look at life, see a story that needs telling, and I tell it. Naturally, names are changed to protect the innocent, but at the core, the story is real. It’s true: life is stranger than fiction.

I’ve been writing a short story for three years. What? Yeah, the first year I was thinking about writing it, the second year I wrote it, and the third year, I danced around cutting out what wasn’t working so the gem inside could shine. I know! Seems like a convoluted process, right? I knew it wasn’t working, I knew I had to get rid of a bunch of stuff, but I wasn’t willing to see it. I was still too in love with my own words to be brutally honest with myself about what had to go. Argh!

Until last week. Last week, a friend asked to see the story I was working on, and thusly flattered, I agreed. Then I realized that I couldn’t show him my shambles of a story yet, I needed to polish it up, make it shine a little. Ah, ego! So, I went to my computer and opened the file, looking at it with new eyes –not my eyes –but maybe the eyes of someone who had never read this story, had no history with it, had no expectations. And then I cut. Ruthlessly, and precisely, I cut. I carved away whole sections without thinking, without getting sentimental about how well written that part of my story was. I think I entered into a sort of trance state. When I came out of it, I looked at what I had done, what my story had become. And I was amazed. What previously had been a cluttered, rambling, densely packed collection of bits and pieces had somehow become clean, simple, honest.

So what’s holding you back? What beautiful gem have you got buried beneath a pile of yesterday’s rubble? What part of your ‘story’ are you not being honest with yourself about? Seriously? Nothing is written in stone. Love, C

My two cents: It’s totally okay to let go of what isn’t working.

♥♥♥

I love getting rid of stuff, letting things go. Maybe that’s why I love to move. Starting with a clean slate. But by the same token I can understand the idea of knowing what’s not working yet, something inside says, just keep it you might need it someday. I don’t like when my life is filled with too much stuff, so much clutter that you can’t see the beauty in what you have. Eliminate all that isn’t necessary, isn’t that what a sculptor does? Chip away at a block of stone until he discovers the work of art that lies within?

C and I are kinda just going with the flow regarding writing this blog, flying by the seat of our pants and I am loving it. Not knowing what’s coming next is kind of exciting. We really don’t know what we’re doing but we have created something that has taken on a life of it’s own and we are just letting it play out organically with no attachment to the outcome. Isn’t that how everything should be?

We have been reading and researching all aspects of blogging, posts, plugins, widgets, etc. I read somewhere that blogs should be about a hundred words less that we have been doing. . .okay, sounds good. I know if I stumble on a blog post that drags on and on I tend to pass on it and move onto something requiring a little less committment . So C and I had no problem cutting down our posts, like I said before, we’re just figuring this all out. No ego attached.

I don’t think it was any coincidence that C met this person who might be interested in her story, the story she had been holding on to for three years at almost the precise moment she became okay with editing her story not because she had to, not because someone told her to but because she knew that it would be the best thing for the story and her ego had nothing to do with it. I just love when things work out like that, but don’t things always work out like that? I am seeing more and more that they do. Amazing what happens when you let go of your ego and fears about how things are going to turn out. xo-K

My two cents: Hold on to your dreams, let go of everything else.

Leave a comment

Filed under Inspiration, law of attraction

"the way it is"

I haven’t always believed in a benevolent universe; it just isn’t what I was taught about the world. But even as a kid, a scary world view just didn’t ring true to me.  As a child, when a situation didn’t feel good, I would make an escape, usually in one of two ways. Either I would go out and play in the lush forests surrounding my home, hanging out in nature; or I would exercise my active imagination, play with my dolls and go to make-believe land. Either way, I went to my “happy place.”

As a grown up person, it isn’t always convenient to run off to the woods. Sometimes I have to stay in place and “be present” with a situation. But often, looking at “what is” and studying it and hanging out in Whatisville doesn’t make me happy. Why is that? Is it because I’m always desiring the next best thing, or because I’m not allowing happiness in? Ouch!

I have never been satisfied with the statement “that’s just the way it is.” I can’t figure out why anyone would just stop wondering, no question, end of story. I have always loved exploring new ways of doing things, new ways of thinking. Seems to me that “what-is-ness” can leads to shutting the door on future happiness, and why would anyone do that?

Focusing on “what is” is just a habit. A pretty ingrained habit, but a habit nonetheless, which means it can be changed. Relief! But resistance is sneaky. Just last night, I woke up and my mind started churning. Then, I decided to  list everything I am grateful for in my life, starting with A, then B, and so on. I got to about D and got distracted by some little worry, some little “what is.”  After a while I realized what I was doing, and resumed my gratitude list.  By the time I got from A to Z, I was so exhausted from the effort to focus, I fell peacefully back to sleep. Why are we so easily distracted by “the way it is?”

I don’t have it figured out. Yeah, just when I think I’ve got it worked out, I’ll discover a super sneaky belief about what-is, one that is keeping me stuck, one that is overdue for healing, and needs to be let go. Super fun! Love, C

My two cents: it’s okay to visit Whatisville, just don’t move in!

♥♥♥

It has been really challenging for me to not chime in my two cents when someone I care about is arguing for their limitations.  I can see that they want something so badly yet they are putting so much energy into all of the ways they think it won’t work out; wanting their child who recently graduated college to find a great job but affirming there are no jobs out there, wanting to be abundant but affirming no one is getting ahead in this economy. No wonder it takes so long to get what you want,  if you even do.  Sometimes we can be our own worst enemy.

I know I can be. Just today with one little phone call, there I was all pissy, arguing for my limitations.  Damn, I still get caught up sometimes and I know better, which makes it even more frustrating.  Seems like the more I do this stuff the harder it is when I am not on track.  Thrown off of the merry-go-round, straight into the bushes as Abraham would say. Not a fun place to be.

We all have beliefs, things we put in the “just the way it is” category, whether we got them from our parents, school, history, the news, it doesn’t matter.  It’s really easy to get going on some perceived injustice and really dig your heels in. Pretty soon everything in your life is going down the tubes, or so it seems.  I was on a rampage on about four different topics this afternoon.  What a crummy way to spend  my day off.

That’s just the way it is

Some things will never change

That’s just the way it is

But don’t you believe them ~Bruce Hornsby

I always loved that song, and don’t you believe them, great line. When someone says something with such conviction but it really doesn’t resonate with you, and you know in your soul it’s not true, don’t believe it, don’t take their word for it, don’t buy into it.

Nothing is set in stone, and no one can say what’s right and true  for you.  I know what’s right for me and even though I got a little off track today, hey it happens. With a little help from my friends and a little tapping with Brad this evening is feeling much better.  xo-K

My two cents:  As much as we want the things outside of us to be the way we want them to be to make us happy, it’s even cooler when we are happy regardless of what’s going on out there.

Leave a comment

Filed under affirmations, fate & destiny, Inspiration