slow down to speed up

For someone who doesn’t own a TV, I have a pretty good idea of what’s going on.  And I never watch the  “news!”  However, one of the funniest, smartest, sweetest new programs around is Modern Family. Love that show!

One of the characters is a goofy dad who is the biggest dork around, but he always manages to ‘get the job done.’ So, in one episode, the family is running around, trying to get out of the house and on a flight to Hawaii for a big family trip. Mom is going out of her mind trying to hurry everyone along while Dad is calmly walking at a snail’s pace, saying, “fast is slow and slow is fast.” And you know what? He’s right! When you try to push things, speed things up, you trip up and then end up having to repeat each step all over again. Sigh.

When things are going right in my life, doors open as if by magic. The right people show up. The right answers appear. Friendly helpful strangers seem to pop in just when I need them. I love it when that happens! Right now for instance, I’ve been seeing someone whom I really like. It’s new, and we’re probably moving slow by today’s standards.  We’re  playing it sort of old school, and its very sweet. Yeah, I’ve moved into these things faster in the past. . .and that didn’t really work out. Now I’m at the point where I’m not working so hard to “get there.” I’m just enjoying the process.

When someone wants to be with you, they are with you. There are no games, no power struggles. It just flows. Not long ago, I dated someone for a short time who insisted he was busy with his kids on the weekends. I know! Then, while having lunch with a friend, talking about how ‘distant’ this guy seemed, my friend asked how old the kids were. “They’re in their twenties,” I replied. “They’re in college.” Dear P looked at me like, you poor dumb thing. “Trust me,” she said. “He’s not hanging with those kids. At that age, those boys are not all about spending time with Dad.”  Hey! I tend to give parents the benefit of the doubt. . .in all circumstances. I’ve heard more than once, “you don’t have kids, so you can’t understand.”  And they’re right. I don’t always understand, but I do know this: when a relationship any relationship —is right, it’s simple. Love, C

My two cents: Trust that you’re exactly where you’re supposed to be. Always.


I don’t know about you but when I feel the need to hurry things along, make things happen, it’s because I feel if I don’t it won’t happen.  When I feel anxious about something there is usually a reason.  Whenever you put crazy nervous energy behind something it usually doesn’t pan out, and it’s probably just as well.

When something is right, it’s right.  It takes on a life of it’s own and you don’t feel any need to make it do or be anything.  I have watched friends throughout the years chase after relationships trying to make this one be the one. Hey, I have done it myself.   Wanting so much to seal the deal, cross it off the list, get it over with and get on to other things.  Really?  That’s how you want your relationship to play out?  What is wrong with enjoying the journey,  watching it unfold, savoring it, enjoying every delicious moment?  Just askin.’

Here’s why I think we do this thing we do, it’s because on some level we know it’s not going to happen.  We know it’s not the job, the house, or the relationship for us. But, we don’t feel it’s really possible to get exactly what we want so we figure, close enough is good enough. Better snatch this one up before someone else who is close enough to it snatches it up first.  (I can’t believe I just said that).

We spend all this time and energy racing around trying to make things happen,  then we’re so surprised and disappointed when they don’t and we have to start all over from square one.  Could things go any slower?

So sometimes you have to stop. . .just stop, take a breath. . .and just know. . .whether it comes from what your Mother said, what your girlfriends said or some voice that you don’t even know said. .  .just have some faith in whatever. There is a divine plan, things are working out for you, so you don’t have to worry.  Aren’t you glad someone knows better than you?  Aren’t you glad someone has your back? xo-K

My two cents:  I am so grateful that when I am spinning out of control there is someone or something to show me the way.


1 Comment

Filed under dating, Inspiration

One response to “slow down to speed up

  1. Yes rushing is always a recipe for disaster. I’ve learned to be patient and allow things to happen at their own speed. They are complete and I’m not stressed! You get to feel the excitment, work out the details, steer away from danger or just as “no” because you can sense the vibe of the universe. Many times going fast means struggles, misunderstandings and battles. In relationships rushing usually means hurt feelings and a broken heart to mend. Go with the flow and enjoy the ride! Life is short, don’t get caught up…

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