Tag Archives: happiness

best friends forever

When I was in High School my best friend D was my partner in crime.  We got ourselves into all kinds of mayhem, we could plot and scheme our way into or out of anything. Harmless stuff really. Need to borrow a car?  Who cared if we were only fifteen and didn’t have a license? Not us.  Home way past curfew?  We could talk our way out of that.  Hell, we even convinced our counselor that we needed to skip fifth  period psychology every Friday, just ‘cuz.

If we needed to figure anything out, between the two of us we could do it, and do it brilliantly.  We felt like Lucy and Ethel, and of course we always had our Rickys and Freds waiting in the wings, scratching their heads but loving every minute of it.

There is something so wonderful about having a best friend  you can totally depend on,  someone who loves you unconditionally and is always there for you.  The keeper of your secrets and dreams.  I’ve been very lucky to have many best friends throughout my life.  I am an only child, so friends are probably more precious to me since I never had a sibling.  My friends where my family.

I’ve also had my share of boyfriends.   But I’ve never had a boyfriend who was a best friend. I guess I always thought  you had your friends and then you had your dates.  How many hours did the “girls” spend trying to figure out the “boys”?  Way too many. I never considered you could have a partner who was also your best friend.

The  first time I saw an example of this was at an Abraham-Hicks workshop.  It was clear to me that Esther and Jerry Hicks had something very special.  They are partners in crime for sure and they love working together, “being” together, and it’s obvious they really enjoy each other.  I love how they are together.

Last Sunday I was watching “Diners, Drive-ins, and Dives,” on the Food Network.   I wasn’t really paying much attention until I saw this couple.  They were driving across the country visiting as many of the “Dives” that Guy Fieri highlighted on the show as they could.  They were so cool, it was clear that they were enjoying what they were doing, and enjoying each other.  They seemed to be having so much fun, so in sync.  Like best friends. Then it hit me,  that’s what I want in a relationship!  xo-K

My two cents:  Once you recognize what you want you start to see more and more examples of it.

♥♥♥

Yeah, friends and lovers.  Sometimes they’re the same person, sometimes they’re not. During one of my most epic break-ups, mi amor cried and said he was losing his best friend. I don’t know what was sadder: the break-up, or that I couldn’t tell him I was losing my bf, too. Ouch to the nth.

Do we expect too much from our lovers? Sometimes, I think so. We have these ideas about who and what they should be and when they show us who they really are, we’re disappointed.  But I don’t think that the way to avoid being disappointed is to stop loving. Oh, heck no.  This tattered heart of mine will continue to beat for love until I’m wearing angel wings, and then some. The answer isn’t to shut down. The answer is perhaps, to love differently.

What we expect from love has evolved over time. The notion of marriage for love is pretty  new, historically speaking. Marriages used to be a business arrangement to secure countries, farms, goats, you name it. Marriage wasn’t about love, it was a transaction. If you got love in the bargain, bonus!  Now that I have become a woman of a certain age, I might even venture to suggest that much of what could be called romantic love is biology at work. I thought I loved my first husband, but now I wonder: was it my heart that was running the show, or my ovaries? Not that I didn’t love him, I did. But maybe not for the reasons I believed.

Best friends are simple. Love is tricky. As a girl, my grandmother fell in love with a boy who lived in a nearby town, but her parents had already chosen a husband for her, my grandfather. Many years later, after Grandpa passed, Grandma looked up her old beau. By then he was widowed too, and they married. In their twilight time, they finally got to express the love they had sparked fifty years earlier. Were they bf’s? I don’t know. But I do know that the initial love they felt had survived the passage of time.

I adore my friends. If my lover also happens to be my bf, I consider myself one lucky girl. Love, C

My two cents: Keep your friends close, your enemies closer, and your lover closest of all.

httpvh://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K4vQwrHZWWk

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Filed under dating, Inspiration, love, relationships

learn something new

I have learned so much since C and I started this little blog.  C has been writing for years, novels, book reviews, grant proposals, journal entries, you name it,  she has written it.  Me, I just had stories, years and years of stories. In my profession I have pretty much heard everything, and human behavior is so interesting to me, but I never thought I could write about my experiences, my interactions or my life.  And if I did, who would want to read it?

Writing has been so healing for me, and although I am not the greatest at getting my point across and not rambling on and on in one never-ending sentence, I think I am getting better.  Thanks to C by the way, who will cut my commas off at the pass when I get too rambly. (Yeah, yeah, I know that’s not a word.)

I am learning so much everyday, we both are.  It’s amazing some of the stuff we have come across that we had never even heard of before.  Headers and widgets and codes, oh my.  I am working parts of my brain that have never been worked before, it’s fun and it feels good. Neither of us knew anything about designing a website or writing a blog, we just got an idea and it took on a life of its own.  Even though initially we weren’t exactly sure what we wanted, we knew what we didn’t want, and as we went along we learned what worked and what didn’t.

I think the best part of this whole adventure is learning to do something new, something so completely out of my comfort zone.  I have been a stylist almost my entire working life.  It was just something I could always do, it was fun, it was easy, it was fulfilling, and still is and I love it, don’t get me wrong.  I am also loving learning to do something so totally different.

One day, I was trying to change the artwork on the header, and it’s all in code,  like another language that I have never seen before. After many hours of reading, researching and trial and error, I figured it out.  I got such a kick out of that, I was doing the happy dance all around my living room.  What a feeling.  Another thing that is new to me is working with a partner. I have always worked solo so I’m sure there were so many ways that this could have gone wrong, but it has been the best. C and I are in agreement that neither of us would have been able to do this in the way we have without the other; where one of us gets discouraged or just plain busy with our day jobs, the other takes over.  Perfect.

So take it from us: if we can do it, so can you.  Try something new, learn something new.  It’s good for your soul, it’s good for your brain, and it’s good for your self-esteem.  Is there anything you’ve ever dreamed about doing?  Take an art class, learn to salsa, go back to college, whatever it is just go for it.  You might end up creating something amazing.  Enjoy, xo-K

My two cents:  You have no idea what life has in store for you.

♥♥♥

Long ago, I decided that there are two kinds of people in the world. Type One picks a decade they like and sticks with it, not matter what. Same hair, same clothes, same world-views. Then, there is Type Two Girls: always ready to try something new, going for that shot of WOW when they experience something fresh. Cool!

Yeah, the world is changing fast. The speed of information coming at us can be overwhelming. I totally get that. I heard recently that because we have access to more information that ever before in the history of the world –if you’re not learning something new, you’re not just standing still, you’re moving backwards.

About ten years ago I met a charming couple from Holland. The were lovely and worldly and had grown children and grandchildren. The newfangled  Internet was becoming all the rage and even though no one had quite figured out what it was good for, everyone was still quite excited about it. Email was eclipsing the cell phone as a way to connect. I remember smiling at my quaint neighbors when they declared that had no interest in learning “that computer stuff.”

Flash forward a decade and its safe to say the world is not the same place. String theory expert and physicist Michio Kaku says that all these social, cultural, and scientific changes are actually part of the evolution of the human race into something. . .greater. Cool!

I just met someone at a business meeting, who identified herself as a communication director. “Great!” I replied. “What is your social media policy?” She gave me a slight frown and shook her head. “Oh, I don’t do that,” she replied. “Maybe I’ll hire someone to do it.”

I understood what she meant. A year ago I reluctantly joined the facebook revolution and maybe posted once a week. I just didn’t see the point. Now, K and I post daily. I tell anyone who will listen that it’s a newer, better way to stay in touch. It’s just a learning curve, that’s all. Nothing scary under the bed or hiding in the Internet closet, my dears.

Admittedly, K is better at the technical stuff than I am. I tend to get all itchy and tossed out of the Vortex and into the bushes when it comes to code and programming. But that’s the beauty of this partnership. We both have skills, that when blended, are better than we would be alone.  We came to realize early on that our  main subject is relationships — every kind under the sun — even two girls writing a blog. Love, C

My two cents: Flexing your brain muscle is a great way to stay vibrant, sexy, and young!



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mambo mama

I love summertime! Okay, so there I was this morning, lolling around in my fluffy yummy bed, appreciating the fact that it was Saturday, which meant I was free to sleep in if I wanted. Yes! Then I looked at the clock and realized that if I was going to take a morning walk I’d better get on it so I jumped up, got dressed and ready to go.

I’m so lucky! I live in a pretty little condo on a ribbon of river, a beautiful body of water that always provides a new view.  One of my favorite ways to get out and take advantage of the view and to get out and move my energetic body, is to take a morning walk along the river. For a while there, I was a complete potato. No exercise baby! And then suddenly the weather got good and I was excited about working out. Does that ever happen to you?  Suddenly, I’m getting up in the morning and doing yoga before work. With the longer days, I’ll sometimes come home at the end of the day and hop on my bike for a spin around the island. Yay! Wait. Who is this maniac who is suddenly so about the work out? Who cares! We love her!

So anyway, I live on the water, next to a beautiful yacht harbor, which btw,  is a great manifestation workshop, to look at all of those beautiful boats and going ‘good for you and that’s for me. . . .’  I love to walk around the harbor on weekend mornings when the  sun is just coming up and the air is sweet. I always feel great when I get out there and start appreciating the dazzling flowers, beautiful boats, the wildlife that is also attracted to this special spot.

I like to take my ipod with me on these morning jaunts, it provides me with a soundtrack to keep me ultra-inspired. So there I am this morning, half-way through the harbor loop, when the Mambo Kings come on. Normally, I skip theses guys and go straight for the Abraham or Barefoot Doctor inspirational messages, but somehow this morning, the Mambo Kings are perfect.  So there I am, singing along to the music, doing a little salsa shuffle as I pass million dollar homes and perfectly polished yachts bobbing on the placid water. I am so in my zone! I don’t care who sees me, what they may think. I am enjoying the moment so fully, I am so completely in my joy that I feel illuminated. That feeling has stayed with me all day, and all I can say is, life is good! Love, C

My two cents: sometimes it’s worth looking like a fool just to get to your happy place~

♥♥♥

It feels good to feel good, and I say get there anyway you can.  If it means skipping down the walking path for all world to see do it, who cares. . . actually people do care, they see you in joy and they feel good too.  Feeling good is contagious so go for it, and when it’s beautiful outside, I feel like, how much better can it get?!

I absolutely love how I feel in the summer, I am definitely a warm weather girl.  I kinda hibernate when the weather is cold but man do I love being out and about when summer hits and the sun is shining.  I want to go places and do things, move my body and be outside.  I, like C have been a bit of a potato, regarding exercise.  After standing all day, the last thing I felt like doing was moving my feet.  But it is amazing after my long hiatus with exercise how great it feels almost immediately once you pick it up again. As much as I know it’s doing great things for my muscles, I think it is doing  much more for my head.

Like meditation, and I know  a lot of people don’t know how to meditate or just can’t seem to quiet their mind, exercise can get you to the same place.  When you are taking in all that oxygen, moving your body, you are in the zone, in the Vortex.  You meditate to release resistance, exercise does the same thing, and  that is where inspiration lives.  I can’t tell you how many times in the last few weeks when I’ve been working on a problem or even wondering what to blog about and I get on the elliptical machine or go out for a walk and BAM, there it is, divine inspiration. It’s like opening up a wonderful treasure chest full of everything you need, answers to questions, solutions to problems. Great ideas just seem to occur to you, when you get to a good feeling place, you are inspired.

Life really is good and things really do always work out for you so enjoy your life.  When you wake up in the morning, before you jump out of bed, take a few minutes to appreciate all the good things in  your life.  Do some yoga, go to the gym, go outside for a quick walk before work or just put on some great music and boogie around your house. It’s amazing how when you start your day like that the day just seems to flow, and you will have more great days than not.

My daughter and I have a thing,  whenever we go on vacation we speak with different accents, especially when we are in taxis.  We started  a few years ago and it’s hilarious. We are terrible at it but it’s fun and we don’t care what other people think. I know it is something we will always remember.  Ahhh, good times. xo-K

My two cents:  Do whatever it takes to feel good.  Move your body, sing, dance, be silly. . .enjoy.

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Filed under health & wellbeing, Inspiration

if you can’t say something nice…

I used to have a friend, a novelist, who would often complain about her books, her publisher, her agent. As an aspiring writer, I found this to be really painful to listen to. I thought to myself if only I had a publisher, an agent, a string of books, I would be the happiest girl on the planet! But then I realized that my friend complained about her success (in part) so that  other people wouldn’t envy her, resent her. It was like she cast a spell of unhappiness around herself to protect herself. Clever!

There seems to be a prevailing belief that to claim happiness is to jinx it. What? It’s true.  Why do we do that? Why, when someone compliments us on the snappy little outfit we’re wearing, we say, “Oh, this old thing?” We’re used to telling lies. We’re trained from early on to say things that are not true in order to please someone else.  We do it all the time.

One of the weird ways people socialize is to complain. It goes like this: someone complains about something, maybe their mean boss. The next person has a worse story, the list of complaints grow, get worse, expand, and the next thing you know, someone is working for witchy Miranda Priestly from The Devil Wears Prada.  It’s an epidemic! People seem to really love the rush they get from topping the last bad story with something even worse. Why do we do that?

My mother used to drive me crazy when she said, “if you can’t say something nice to your brother, don’t say anything at all.”  I thought she was nuts.  My brother was the torment of my childhood. Although my mother was just trying to mold me into a polite little lady, there was really a deeper truth at work. Language isn’t simply about telling stories. Thoughts are things. Words are magic.

When you realize the words you say create the world you live in, you start to watch what you say. If you really get serious about it, you start to monitor your thoughts. How in the world can I manage my thoughts, you say, there are thousands of them a day! Exactly. There are thousands of them a day, and they are mostly just a string of the same thoughts playing over and over again on a loop. When you start to monitor the things you say because you know you create your world by your words, you start to say nicer things. You start saying nicer things to other people and best of all, you start saying nicer things to yourself.

Affirmations aren’t just fluffy little words we spread around like pink icing on cupcakes. Affirmations are how we start telling a better (truer) story about ourselves and our world. And isn’t that what we really want? Love, C

My two cents: start saying one nice thing to yourself in the mirror everyday and see what kind of magic you can make!

♥♥♥

What if someone told you that everything you said, every word out of your mouth especially if you repeated it over and over would come true?  Would you be more careful what you said?  I have been really aware of what I think and what I say lately  and I know it’s hard not to notice “what is.”

There are so many things going on out there that are true.  So many things to look at; things that make you feel good and things that make you feel terrible.  Why does it seem that the icky stuff  is so much easier to focus on?  Do we really think we will jinx something if we affirm it?  Some people don’t want to think or expect anything good because they don’t want to be disappointed.  Really? If you believe things always work out the way they are supposed to –and they do, by the way –then I say why not dream big.

I got the idea for this post after sitting down by the pool  in my building. I touched on it a bit in the last post turn it around. One of my neighbors was on her cell phone going on and on about how crappy her life was, complaining about some issue she was having with Comcast and AT&T. Seriously? You’re sitting by a beautiful pool on a beautiful summer day in beautiful wine country, and you’re complaining about your internet provider?  My daughter and I were lounging nearby, totally present in the moment, totally enjoying where we were, sitting in one of the top vacation destinations in the world, and we get to live here.

It really made me think, what if we just enjoyed right where we are, in the moment, and looked around for things to appreciate, things to love, and milked them for all they were worth?  What if we complimented instead of complained?  What if when someone complimented us we just said, “thank you,” instead of trying to talk them out of their admiration and appreciation of us?  What if we didn’t have something nice to say about ourselves, someone else or a dilemma we are dealing with we just shut the hell up?  I don’t know about you but looking at problems and talking about them incessantly is getting really old.  It doesn’t help anything AND it doesn’t feel good, in case it matters.

Last year C, got a purple rubber bracelet from an organization, A Complaint Free World. The idea was to wear the bracelet on one wrist for 30 days. The catch: you could only keep the bracelet on that wrist if you did not let one complaint pass your lips. If it did, you had to switch wrists.  At first, you might move the band two or three times a day. Eventually,  you might keep in on a whole day . . .or even a whole week!  Imagine a whole month.  Give it a try, you’ll be amazed how many times you notice yourself being negative and once you notice, you can make a conscious effort to change the way you see things and what you say about them.  xo-K

My two cents:  Consciously turn whatever you say into a positive and if you can’t, don’t say anything at all.


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if you can't say something nice…

I used to have a friend, a novelist, who would often complain about her books, her publisher, her agent. As an aspiring writer, I found this to be really painful to listen to. I thought to myself if only I had a publisher, an agent, a string of books, I would be the happiest girl on the planet! But then I realized that my friend complained about her success (in part) so that  other people wouldn’t envy her, resent her. It was like she cast a spell of unhappiness around herself to protect herself. Clever!

There seems to be a prevailing belief that to claim happiness is to jinx it. What? It’s true.  Why do we do that? Why, when someone compliments us on the snappy little outfit we’re wearing, we say, “Oh, this old thing?” We’re used to telling lies. We’re trained from early on to say things that are not true in order to please someone else.  We do it all the time.

One of the weird ways people socialize is to complain. It goes like this: someone complains about something, maybe their mean boss. The next person has a worse story, the list of complaints grow, get worse, expand, and the next thing you know, someone is working for witchy Miranda Priestly from The Devil Wears Prada.  It’s an epidemic! People seem to really love the rush they get from topping the last bad story with something even worse. Why do we do that?

My mother used to drive me crazy when she said, “if you can’t say something nice to your brother, don’t say anything at all.”  I thought she was nuts.  My brother was the torment of my childhood. Although my mother was just trying to mold me into a polite little lady, there was really a deeper truth at work. Language isn’t simply about telling stories. Thoughts are things. Words are magic.

When you realize the words you say create the world you live in, you start to watch what you say. If you really get serious about it, you start to monitor your thoughts. How in the world can I manage my thoughts, you say, there are thousands of them a day! Exactly. There are thousands of them a day, and they are mostly just a string of the same thoughts playing over and over again on a loop. When you start to monitor the things you say because you know you create your world by your words, you start to say nicer things. You start saying nicer things to other people and best of all, you start saying nicer things to yourself.

Affirmations aren’t just fluffy little words we spread around like pink icing on cupcakes. Affirmations are how we start telling a better (truer) story about ourselves and our world. And isn’t that what we really want? Love, C

My two cents: start saying one nice thing to yourself in the mirror everyday and see what kind of magic you can make!

♥♥♥

What if someone told you that everything you said, every word out of your mouth especially if you repeated it over and over would come true?  Would you be more careful what you said?  I have been really aware of what I think and what I say lately  and I know it’s hard not to notice “what is.”

There are so many things going on out there that are true.  So many things to look at; things that make you feel good and things that make you feel terrible.  Why does it seem that the icky stuff  is so much easier to focus on?  Do we really think we will jinx something if we affirm it?  Some people don’t want to think or expect anything good because they don’t want to be disappointed.  Really? If you believe things always work out the way they are supposed to –and they do, by the way –then I say why not dream big.

I got the idea for this post after sitting down by the pool  in my building. I touched on it a bit in the last post turn it around. One of my neighbors was on her cell phone going on and on about how crappy her life was, complaining about some issue she was having with Comcast and AT&T. Seriously? You’re sitting by a beautiful pool on a beautiful summer day in beautiful wine country, and you’re complaining about your internet provider?  My daughter and I were lounging nearby, totally present in the moment, totally enjoying where we were, sitting in one of the top vacation destinations in the world, and we get to live here.

It really made me think, what if we just enjoyed right where we are, in the moment, and looked around for things to appreciate, things to love, and milked them for all they were worth?  What if we complimented instead of complained?  What if when someone complimented us we just said, “thank you,” instead of trying to talk them out of their admiration and appreciation of us?  What if we didn’t have something nice to say about ourselves, someone else or a dilemma we are dealing with we just shut the hell up?  I don’t know about you but looking at problems and talking about them incessantly is getting really old.  It doesn’t help anything AND it doesn’t feel good, in case it matters.

Last year C, got a purple rubber bracelet from an organization, A Complaint Free World. The idea was to wear the bracelet on one wrist for 30 days. The catch: you could only keep the bracelet on that wrist if you did not let one complaint pass your lips. If it did, you had to switch wrists.  At first, you might move the band two or three times a day. Eventually,  you might keep in on a whole day . . .or even a whole week!  Imagine a whole month.  Give it a try, you’ll be amazed how many times you notice yourself being negative and once you notice, you can make a conscious effort to change the way you see things and what you say about them.  xo-K

My two cents:  Consciously turn whatever you say into a positive and if you can’t, don’t say anything at all.


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Filed under affirmations, Inspiration, spirituality

turn it around

You know, we Two Girls aren’t just handing out advice here like Lifesaver candies on a road trip. We’re actually doing the work, talking about it between ourselves, chatting about it some more, and then putting it out there for all to read. Fun!

One of the best tools I’ve found lately is the Turn-Around.  It’s a Readers Digest Condensed version of Byron Katie’s work, which involves a series of questions.  Katie’s work is amazing stuff. I’ve heard about it for years, and I guess I just wasn’t ready to hear it, because I only just recently picked up her book. You know how that is, right? Someone tells you about a great self-help book, and you listen to interviews, read reviews, dance all around it, but don’t actually do the actual work because that’s too scary, right? Oh, wait. Maybe that’s just me. . . .

Anyway, so Katie has this process that involves focusing on something that pushes every hot button you’ve got. And that’s where the work begins. Like a grandma, Katie says, “okay sweetheart, let’s begin.” Seems safe enough to talk to Grandma, right?

The trouble with the work for me, is that it involves a series of logical and armor-piercing questions. But when I’m in the middle of my drama, the last thing I want to do is sit down and run myself through a list of questions. So I’ve figured out a shortcut. I go right to the apex of Katie’s work: the turnaround. The turnaround works like this: whatever it is you’re blaming the other person for, you turn it around and own it. “She’s so selfish!” becomes “I am so selfish!”  Projections like “He never supports what is important to me” become “I don’t support what is important to me.”

It seems kind of crazy, but it works. When you reject a part of yourself, your little inner goddess finds it too painful to bear, and so you project it onto someone else, blame someone else. I’m not bad. . .you’re bad! It seems to fix the problem, but the problem never really goes away until you deal with it.

I recently had the chance to work this out with a co-worker who bailed on an important project just a couple of hours before I had to present it to the board of directors. I started to stew. “She’s so irresponsible!” I said to myself, feeling justified. And then I stopped, took a breath, and turned it around. “Wait,” I said to myself. “I’m so irresponsible.” It wasn’t until I said that, that I realized where I had let the project down, I hadn’t given it my best.  I immediately felt better. And you know what? My co-worker who had called in sick showed up at the office, completed her part of the project, and then went home again.

This stuff isn’t always fun, and it isn’t always pretty, but it works if you’re willing to work it! Love, C

My two cents: The world is just a mirror of our thoughts, showing us the places we still need to heal.

♥♥♥

Like I said before I haven’t read Byron Katie’s book yet but I guess since it keeps coming up, (thanks C), I better get on it. But I have been noticing the same things in my own life C is talking about.  I love how that works.

All the things that bother you, or things you simply notice are clues for you, like a cosmic treasure hunt, guiding you along your path to higher consciousness.  I have become really aware when I notice something that  someone else is doing and it really annoys me, that there is a lesson in there for me.  There is something around it that I need to work on  and instead of it just being annoyed by it, I am starting to see it as a gift.

This is new to me so I am still bumbling around with it but you have no idea how cool it is when you get to the point that no matter what is happening out there you are still okay. Or better than okay because you really get that everything that gets your attention, that you are noticing is for your benefit.

One of the things that can stress me out and get my panties in a bunch are red lights.  Sounds so silly and unimportant but don’t most people get the craziest about the simplest things.  I get irritated when I am running late for work and I hit every red light, is someone watching me and pushing a button turning those stupid lights red as I pull up?  Of course not but doesn’t it feel like that sometimes?  Grrrr.

I now know that red lights only bother me when I am running late.  The light is the same, my reaction to them is different depending on what I am doing.  If I leave the house with plenty of time I have no issue with sitting at a stoplight. And let’s face it, don’t you sometimes hope you hit a red light  because you need to look at directions or apply your lipstick ?  Just sayin’.

You can apply this way of thinking to pretty much any issue, big or small.  It’s easier to start with something seemingly small and unimportant, but sometimes those are the ones you have to biggest problem with.  Do you really care if the waitress or someone you don’t know or care about is rude to you?  Does it really matter if an anonymous driver speeds up to cut in front of you on the freeway?  Really?

Last week my daughter and I were relaxing at our pool.  There was a girl sitting near us  on the phone complaining about her life, while her kids were in the pool screaming for attention.  She repeated her “story,” over and over to each friend who came to join her at the pool.  At first I was annoyed, I wished she would just shut the hell up, then I stopped and realized how interesting it was that we were sitting in the same place by a beautiful pool, on a beautiful day and in that moment having two totally different experiences.  Does she have more problems than I do to fuss about?  Maybe, but in that moment, she wasn’t even appreciating what she had. xo-K

My two cents:  Everything that is happening out there is for your benefit, it really is.

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Filed under relationships, self-care, spirituality

whistle while you work

I love my work, love what I do, always have.  Started out just a fun girlie hobby thing and now 30 years later, I’m still at it.  The first time I did a haircut it was at my bff D’s house.  We were flipping through Seventeen magazine and there was a bit about cutting the perfect shag.  It went on to say that if you stood on a chair with your head upside down and a friend cut straight across you would have this amazing shag haircut.  Well, we had a chair and she did need a haircut and we were bored so. . . I have to say that even with kitchen scissors, the cut was awesome, and a career was born.

I was lucky, I found something I loved to do that I could make money doing,  early on.  Very lucky.  So many people I know hate their jobs, well maybe hate is a little harsh, but they go to work everyday not wanting to be where they are doing what they are doing.  I can’t even imagine spending all day every day doing something that didn’t make me happy and bring me joy, just for the money.  Uggg, so not fun.

C and I have been talking about this ever since we started our little project here, our blog.  We love it so, it’s so much fun and we get so much out of it. Yeah, right now it is just a hobby, and our therapy,  in case it matters.  We work really hard on it, but it doesn’t seem like work at all and it has taught me so much.  Like I said before, I love being a stylist, but this is different.  Just as much work, but very different.  And considering neither of us even knew what a blog was four months ago, and we have just been figuring it out along the way, I think we’re doing a great job at it.

The thing is, when you find something you love to do, you’re good at it, and it doesn’t seem like work.  Someone asked C how much time she puts into this, and we don’t even really know because we are having so much fun and it is always on our minds it seems like all of our time but it’s effortless.  Isn’t that how work should be?

You think of people on film crews, they work like 16 hr days, but they become a family, they have so much love and passion for what they are creating that as hard as they are working they seem to be enjoying they process and experience a letdown when it is complete.  I have seen this with the my daughter and her friends when she was doing theater. Those kids would work so hard rehearsing for hours every night to give everyone a great show and when they performed for the last time, all the kids cry, along with many of the parents.  They loved what they were doing and were sad to see it end.

Seems like things are changing these days, people are losing their jobs, jobs they have been doing for maybe their whole lives.  Maybe they loved their jobs, but a lot of them were going to work everyday doing what they did because it payed the bills.  A lot of people have thought that you work to pay the bills and it’s not supposed to be fun, that’s why they call it work.  I think you go to work to create, to inspire, and enjoy.  Marsha Sinetar wrote a book called, Do What You Love, The Money Will Follow.  I read that way back in the 80’s, and have always know it to be true.  When you enjoy what you do, you do it with ease, and it never seems like work. xo-K

My two cents:  You should love all aspects of your life, even how you pay the bills.

♥♥♥

Seriously? K really whistles while she works. I noticed it a couple of years ago, and it’s a great reminder that “all is well in the universe and in my world.

Sometimes, when we’re working through a tech challenge with our beloved blog, or developing a new policy about a random issue that has surfaced, she’ll start whistling. K and I work on the phone a lot, and we’ve been friends long enough to not feel that we have to stuff the gaps with filler. So, we’ll both be surfing through the Net all quiet and focused, and she’ll start to whistle. It’s an instant mood elevator.  You can’t whistle or be close to the whistle and not feel happy!

But back to doing what you love. I’ve been a writer forever. I started keeping journals as a teen drama queen when my feelings overflowed from my heart through pen and paper, and have never stopped. I have not made it to the rarefied ranks of Pulitzer Prize winners or even the New York Times Bestseller list (yet), but I am modestly published, and this makes me happy.

But for a long time, I felt anguish that I wasn’t making my living “as a writer” — which in my narrow mind I had defined as “novelist.”   And then one day I stopped and realized that I do make a living by writing, and I had to laugh at myself. As marketing genie and chief fundraiser for a hometown nonprofit, I write grants and proposals, radio copy, banners, emails to important donors, letters. I write. A lot! When I realized how much money I’ve actually raised with my writing, it made me smile and realize that I had achieved a goal: I am a professional writer. Who knew?

The Universe always gives you what you ask for, maybe just not how you think it will look, but what ev. Adore what shows up. Appreciate each kink in the path. Embrace the what-isness of your life.   Your most important job is to look at what shows up and then fine-tune your request to the cosmic concierge, being more specific about your desired outcomes. I love that the Universe always says Yes! Love, C

My two cents:  be grateful for what shows up; it reveals your real thoughts about what is possible.

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