never the same…

September was a crazy month. Early on, things started going haywire, Mercury was retrograde, and all kinds of trouble was brewing. Everything just seemed a little extra intense. Then K and I tuned in to numerologist Tania Gabrielle and she shed a little light on the numbers at play, and everything made sense.

We’ve been working at this stuff long enough that when things start to spin out of control, we stop and take a breath.  At such times, we know that something bigger is at work. Such a relief! Well, mostly. I’ve got a shopping list of issues that are up for me. These concerns are like old friends, visiting once more. They have settled in comfortably, waiting for me to see them for what they are: lessons to be learned and let go of. Come on!

The thing is, once you know how things work, there’s no going back. There’s no blaming anyone else for the elements at work in your life. Money? Work? Love? These are the themes we work with, but the lessons all tend to be related to the same source: healing our own sacred wounds, those old friends, the ones we came here to heal.

You know what I mean. The bff who always seems to fall for the married guy, no matter what. Or the friend of a friend who switches jobs, but always seems to land a boss who takes advantage of her kind nature, and never really gives her the props she deserves. Is it a coincidence that these issues come up again and again? Does it mean we’re flawed and doomed to replay our lives Groundhog Day style forever? No. Yes.

Remember Bill Murray’s character in Groundhog Day? He was cursed to wake up to Sonny & Cher every morning, meet the same small town people, deal with the same annoying dilemmas until he changed his mind. Once he got it, once he realized that he was the force of magic behind it all, he had the power to change it. When he did, everything fell into place, even the love he so deeply desired. As it turns out, we are all the magic we need. Love, C

My two cents: when I allow my soul to govern my decisions, everything works  out better for me.

♥♥♥

Are healing old patterns up now or what?  Seems like all my old dusty patterns that have been stored waaaay down deep are coming up and out to be healed once and for all. Finally!  Wow, that was a mouthful, but so true.

I was telling C a few weeks ago that it felt like someone was taking a miner’s pick  and chipping off any residual anything that is still there. Like plaque between your teeth, it almost becomes a part of you.  I have been working on all this stuff for so long but there was still the really stubborn patterns and beliefs that didn’t want to budge.  All I can say is be careful what you ask for, it’s a bumpy ride.

There were days that I couldn’t get out of bed, not from depression, but I think I was doing so much healing work in my sleep, I felt as if I had been drugged.  Very weird, but after a few days I had some really big aha moments, and I don’t think I’ll ever be the same.  No, I can absolutely say I will never be the same.

I see the dynamics from my original family so clearly now. For years I felt bad, felt guilty, felt wrong, I was blamed and took the blame for things that were never my fault.  I guess it was the lesser of two evils.  When I think of all the years I tried to right the wrongs that were never really wrong, playing the scenario over and over with different partners, trying to heal the past. I didn’t get it. But now I do.

Writing this blog has helped me so much, between my Ken doll theory and Dating my Dad, it’s all brought me to this place now,  what a fun way to work on your stuff.  I’ll tell you one thing, as seductive as it is to just act like things are okay when they’re not,  just know you are only prolonging the inevitable.  Nothing goes away by itself, nothing gets healed without you working on it, and it may be as simple as just looking at it, honestly.  Everything that comes into your life is there for a reason, to heal your heart   and guide you to  your most amazing life.  xo-K

My two cents:  how many days or dates are you going to have to do over and over again until you get what you came here to learn.

 

once you’re clear it’s clear

Clarity is something our souls crave. But we walk around in our dim little haze, comfortable with a gray little world.  We like it. It fits. It requires nothing of us but to keep sleep-walking. But Clarity? That bitch wants things from you!  She wants you to step up. She wants you to take own-her-ship of your life, no more victim, no more wimpy chic. She wants you to let your light shine!

How do you know when you’re clear? You just do.  It’s  a feeling in your blood, a holy presence that sweeps away the mists of doubt and you can see everything  with super sharp focus. You know what that feels like. We’ve all felt it from time to time. Maybe a better question to ask is: how do you get clear? Well, personally, I pray.

Sometimes, I’m bipping right along and I don’t necessarily want more clarity. Right? Things seem just fine the way they are, why rock the boat? Why ask to see things any differently? After all, if it’s different, I might be required to adjust my perception. Change my mind. Change my  expectations. Change my life from mediocre to magnificent. Hate when that happens!

Okay, so there I was: driving from my house up to visit K one day a couple of years ago. I was dating a pretty groovy guy. He wasn’t Mr. Right, but at that time he was Mr. Close Enough. Things were going well.  We were having fun. Why, oh why rock the proverbial boat? Something in me just knew. Something in me wanted to get clear. Dang! So out of the blue, I’m driving along and I just start praying. Show me the truth, I said to the general all-pervading glorious goodness all around me.

Well,  it wasn’t five minutes later that Mr. Man called. I picked up my phone and we started to chat and before you can say Silence is Golden, he spit out a piece of truth. Bless his little heart, he didn’t think it was all that big a deal, but to me? Yeah, super big deal. Deal breaker, actually. Up to that moment I had been happy with fuzzy, and then something changed. In that dazzling, lightning-bolt moment, I got crystal clear. And then suddenly fuzzy just wasn’t enough anymore. Love, C

My two cents: pray for truth and then have the courage to bless what shows up.

♥♥♥

Yup, sometimes you don’t want to know, even when your soul already knows.  Sometimes close enough is good enough, until it’s not anymore.  Seems every time I’ve prayed for clarity, it’s been when I already knew the answer, I just needed confirmation. When you are sure of the way you’re going you don’t stop to ask for directions.  But when you feel lost you probably are.

I was just driving home from dropping my daughter off at school, I was listening to the latest Abraham-Hicks workshop.  Someone asked a question about the latest book that has not been released yet called Spirituality, the Final Frontier. They said they named it that because getting in vibrational alignment with your Source is the last thing people try before they completely give up hope, but it is the only thing that ever really works to begin with.  Ahhh! Clarity is alignment. . . and you just know when you’re there.

As good as it feels to be in alignment and have the clarity that we all really crave, sometimes it feels better to be where you are.  With the boyfriend that you know in your head is not really the one but your heart is hoping will someday change. Or at  the job that feels like, if those other people would just leave me alone to do my work  it would be okay I guess.  Really?  We all know that we didn’t come here for okay.  We came here for amazing, and your soul knows it, and will call you on it every single time.

Do you trust your intuition?  Do you know when something comes up if your initial reaction is your fear-ego or your intuition-higher-self?  Try this out for size: next time someone asks you to do something,  don’t just unconsciously do what you always do. Stop, think, feel.  What comes up for you?  Would you just rather do something you really don’t want to do because it seems easier than telling someone you don’t want to?

Would you rather just stay in your comfort zone because it’s easier than trying something new even though you might love it?  I have been asking myself these  questions lately and I’m so happy with what is opening up for me.  I am seeing life in a whole new way. xo-K

My two cents: open your eyes and  see things clearly, possibly for the first time.

 

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NkwJ-g0iJ6w

don’t get mad. . .get furious!

Grr! I had one of those days, you know? My car (leased) had a leak last spring. I live in the rain belt, and was driving around one day after a crazy end-of-times downpour and heard water sloshing around inside the car. What?  After a couple of days, the water noise persisted, so I drove into the dealership, where they discovered that a drainage tube from my sunroof had malfunctioned, and instead of draining outside the car, was pouring water into the passenger side of the car. Seriously?

Recently, I noticed a funky, spoiled milk smell in the car. So today when I delivered my car to the dealer for an oil change, I asked them to check it out. I waited all day, then called the service department to get a status report. After sitting on hold for a suspiciously long time, a guy came on and said they were “just finishing up.”  Really? “What about the leak?” I asked. More time on hold. Well, the upshot is that there is in fact, a leak and while they haven’t exactly pinpointed it, they can’t fix it today because the guy who can authorize the extra-special work is out of town. Oi.

According to the all-seeing Google, my dealership is exactly 2.1 miles from where I work. So I went to a co-worker’s office, where my boss was also hanging. “What’s up,” my boss asked. “I need a ride,” I replied. “My car got serviced today and they didn’t fix it, but I need to pick it up.” Now, I swear to God, this is what happened: the co-worker hunched his shoulders and stared even harder at his computer screen. My boss looked at me and said “wow, that’s too bad,” and walked away.

Seriously?  “Eff that,” I said to myself, and called a cab.  Then naturally, I called K. “Don’t get all spiritual about it,” K advised, “get mad!” So I did. We both blew off steam together, and it felt really good! We ended up laughing because we just kept getting more outrageous about expressing our various reasons for being royally pissed off. You know what? I’m clear now, instead of being in a stew. Thank you, stupid co-workers! Love, C

My two cents: pushing down your feelings is like pushing a beach  ball under water — they’ll just pop up again and again until you resolve them.

♥♥♥

Anger is a valid emotion.  It is in about the middle of the emotional guidance scale I mentioned a few posts back, but we all, for some reason have some issues when we or someone we know gets “angry.” Whether we think we are not entitled to being angry, or as C said before, it’s not spiritual to be angry, anger has been coming up for me and when something keeps showing up. . .there is something there for me to learn.

When you don’t own your feelings, when you don’t honor the fact that you have the right to feel however you feel,  you are doing a disservice to yourself.  If you don’t have your own back, OMG, well that’s a recipe for depression.  We all have the right to feel how we feel.  And if someone does something mean or stupid, well. . . you can be pissed about it! Then let it go.

I can tell you that is 100 percent true.  When we first started writing this post, C was dumbfounded by the complete insensitivity she experienced at work.  I on the other hand was mad at my mom.  We both kinda went off and vented big time.  It felt good, felt clear, I started writing kinda in the middle of all that and then had to go pick up kids or something so I just figured I would go back to this where I left off, but I couldn’t.  I tried twice, we even started a whole other post and I still couldn’t get back to this one, until today. . .   and it just hit me,  since I had released the anger, vented with C, it was gone.  I wasn’t angry anymore so I couldn’t call it back up and continue with the post with the same energy.

That’s the beauty of feeling your feelings, getting furious if that’s how you are feeling in the moment.  Once you get it out, it’s done.  Over.  Awesome!  Sure, you might get mad again, but you won’t go bonkers if someone cuts you off in traffic.You already let all the people from the last month or your whole lifetime, have a pass, which means you don’t have to vent now.  Wow! See? It works out for everyone.  xo-K

My two cents:  everything is energy, and everything has value, even anger.

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LkgEZa7lDHw

banned from craigslist

I’m so proud! I’ve been banned from craigslist for promoting Two Girls. Yeah, we’re pretty risky.

For the last six months, I’ve been driving traffic to Two Girls via craigslist. Well, I might have broken a rule or two. You’re not supposed to post the same message in more than one city, but um, I might have done that once or twice. Ironically, that’s not what got me banned. What got me put in the deep freeze is that a person or persons in a very liberal San Francisco suburb which shall go unnamed, “flagged” me each time I posted to that community.

I know, I know, I shouldn’t have kept poking that hornet’s nest with a stick, but come on! So why did this uber-progressive community have a problem with Two Girls? Couldn’t have been the blog itself. If the purity police had bothered to click on the link I provided and actually read a blog entry by Two Girls, they would have seen that we are a spiritually positive, family-friendly place to hang out. But I don’t think they got that far. I think their cultural prejudice kicked in before they read even one sentence that Two Girls had to share. No, I think they based their bias on the name. Really?

Yep, Two Girls Take on Love has many implications. I don’t need to be specific, you know what I mean. K and I learned that early on, when reading stats on our admin page. You can actually see what kind of search words people plug into their browsers to find websites. Some of the phrases that people used that got them directed to TGTOL were downright nasty. Ick! Ick!

We were so creeped out by what people were looking for related to two girls, we actually lobbied WordPress to change the design of their admin pages. Well truthfully, it was K. She fired off a couple of rip-snorting emails that got the attention of the web masters, and they changed the design of the page so that we can “hide” or “show” the search engine reports. Nice!

Back to Two Girls Take On Love. It’s who we are, and we don’t apologize for it. Banned from craigslist?  Bring it. Love, C

My two cents: never apologize for your dazzling light!

♥♥♥

Ahh, craigslist, where anyone can post pretty much anything, except us. I think it’s hysterical.

When C and I first started Two girls it wasn’t even Two girls it was just us, wanting to do something meaningful together, wanting to share all we have learned along the way to where we are, and not really knowing how to do it and what it would be if we did it and who if anyone, would even care.

We basically started writing our phone conversations, or maybe just the idea of our conversations.  Then, once we had something, we didn’t really feel comfortable telling our friends about what we were doing, heck we didn’t even know what we were doing yet.  And I’m sorry, you could have the best friends in the world, which we both do, but how do you  explain that you are writing a blog about love, when you, a) don’t really know what you are doing and  b) some of your friends could argue that you are probably the last person who should be writing about love.

Once we had a few posts under our belts and we were feeling like something was happening here, we wanted to put it out there. C got the idea to toss it out to craigslist.  Awesome, we got responses, we got great  feedback, people seemed to love us and then the powers that be. . .well I guess they didn’t.

One of the most important things C and I have learned throughout this process is don’t push against what’s not working.  If something isn’t working there’s a reason, so go with it and be open to another way.  I think it’s human nature to try to fix something that is perceived to be broken. It was working and now it’s not, we gotta go back in time and see where it went wrong and get it right. You can do that I guess, but I’ve got about a thousand examples of that not working.

So back to craigslist, I think it was great, it served a purpose but now it’s time to move on.  We have found better more effective ways to promote and share our stories.  Could we go up against craigslist, fight for our right to say what we want to say?  We could, but it is just too much wasted energy, energy that could go toward something way more fun and productive.  xo-K

My two cents:   the sooner you come to peace with that one door closing, the faster the next door will open.

http://youtu.be/GKXKyAkk4Fs

best friends forever

When I was in High School my best friend D was my partner in crime.  We got ourselves into all kinds of mayhem, we could plot and scheme our way into or out of anything. Harmless stuff really. Need to borrow a car?  Who cared if we were only fifteen and didn’t have a license? Not us.  Home way past curfew?  We could talk our way out of that.  Hell, we even convinced our counselor that we needed to skip fifth  period psychology every Friday, just ‘cuz.

If we needed to figure anything out, between the two of us we could do it, and do it brilliantly.  We felt like Lucy and Ethel, and of course we always had our Rickys and Freds waiting in the wings, scratching their heads but loving every minute of it.

There is something so wonderful about having a best friend  you can totally depend on,  someone who loves you unconditionally and is always there for you.  The keeper of your secrets and dreams.  I’ve been very lucky to have many best friends throughout my life.  I am an only child, so friends are probably more precious to me since I never had a sibling.  My friends where my family.

I’ve also had my share of boyfriends.   But I’ve never had a boyfriend who was a best friend. I guess I always thought  you had your friends and then you had your dates.  How many hours did the “girls” spend trying to figure out the “boys”?  Way too many. I never considered you could have a partner who was also your best friend.

The  first time I saw an example of this was at an Abraham-Hicks workshop.  It was clear to me that Esther and Jerry Hicks had something very special.  They are partners in crime for sure and they love working together, “being” together, and it’s obvious they really enjoy each other.  I love how they are together.

Last Sunday I was watching “Diners, Drive-ins, and Dives,” on the Food Network.   I wasn’t really paying much attention until I saw this couple.  They were driving across the country visiting as many of the “Dives” that Guy Fieri highlighted on the show as they could.  They were so cool, it was clear that they were enjoying what they were doing, and enjoying each other.  They seemed to be having so much fun, so in sync.  Like best friends. Then it hit me,  that’s what I want in a relationship!  xo-K

My two cents:  Once you recognize what you want you start to see more and more examples of it.

♥♥♥

Yeah, friends and lovers.  Sometimes they’re the same person, sometimes they’re not. During one of my most epic break-ups, mi amor cried and said he was losing his best friend. I don’t know what was sadder: the break-up, or that I couldn’t tell him I was losing my bf, too. Ouch to the nth.

Do we expect too much from our lovers? Sometimes, I think so. We have these ideas about who and what they should be and when they show us who they really are, we’re disappointed.  But I don’t think that the way to avoid being disappointed is to stop loving. Oh, heck no.  This tattered heart of mine will continue to beat for love until I’m wearing angel wings, and then some. The answer isn’t to shut down. The answer is perhaps, to love differently.

What we expect from love has evolved over time. The notion of marriage for love is pretty  new, historically speaking. Marriages used to be a business arrangement to secure countries, farms, goats, you name it. Marriage wasn’t about love, it was a transaction. If you got love in the bargain, bonus!  Now that I have become a woman of a certain age, I might even venture to suggest that much of what could be called romantic love is biology at work. I thought I loved my first husband, but now I wonder: was it my heart that was running the show, or my ovaries? Not that I didn’t love him, I did. But maybe not for the reasons I believed.

Best friends are simple. Love is tricky. As a girl, my grandmother fell in love with a boy who lived in a nearby town, but her parents had already chosen a husband for her, my grandfather. Many years later, after Grandpa passed, Grandma looked up her old beau. By then he was widowed too, and they married. In their twilight time, they finally got to express the love they had sparked fifty years earlier. Were they bf’s? I don’t know. But I do know that the initial love they felt had survived the passage of time.

I adore my friends. If my lover also happens to be my bf, I consider myself one lucky girl. Love, C

My two cents: Keep your friends close, your enemies closer, and your lover closest of all.

httpvh://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K4vQwrHZWWk

what’s in it for me?

Yesterday, I had to run out to a winery to pick up a donation for this big fancy-pants fundraiser I’m planning. When I finally found the place high on a mountain top, it was a construction zone. I had two addresses for the winery, and the other one was exactly 20 miles away. For half a minute, I thought about tip-toeing through the hard hat zone to see if I was at the right place, but I dismissed the idea. I got back into my car and drove to the other location, only to be told that what I needed was back where I started. Sigh!

Going with the flow, going with your intuition always seems to work out best.  And when you don’t, it kind of bites you in the ass. Have you noticed?

Last weekend I was invited to dinner with a friend, and I almost opted out but then thought, what the heck, life is short, carpe diem. And wouldn’t you know, I sat across the dinner table from a woman whose company I’d been trying to make contact with, but without much luck. We were just casually talking and when I found out she was with Company X, I asked her if I could call her the next day, and of course she agreed.  So cool!

A couple of days ago, I had to dash to Macy’s at lunch and pick up some mascara. Yeah, why can’t I just wear the drug store brand? Anyway, I got to the cosmetics counter, and got my order ready, then the computer wouldn’t accept my card. So, Kat, my super-cool sales associate, placed a call. She was so sweet and apologetic about my “inconvenience” — and I was very aware that I was standing  at the intersection of amused and beotch, and could go either way. Long story short and about 3o minutes later, I learned that my account had been closed. What? Yeah, not by me, but whatever. The upside? I got a sack full of groovy cosmetic samples, Kat and I are now buddies, and she’s very excited about getting to know Two Girls.

You know, I could have got all righteous about the screw-up at the department store, but instead, I had fun with it. After all, no one lost a limb or a life, and I made a new friend.  Love, C

My two cents: Sometimes you need to leap first and ask questions later. Sometimes you just need to relax and ask for samples.

♥♥♥

I always ask for samples, so cute, perfect size to toss in your purse.  I just love getting free stuff.  A few months ago a friend from work and I decided we were going to get something free, everyday, just for fun. Every morning we would make the statement, I’m going to get something  free today.  Then we would let it go and go about our business.  It usually didn’t take long before a client brought in a coffee or a bottle of wine.  It didn’t have to be anything big, just free.  So much fun!

Just set an intention, let it go with no attachment to the outcome. Don’t worry about it not happening or all the ways it can’t happen, just toss it out there. . . and before you know it, there it is.  So cool.

There have been times that I thought I wanted something to happen,  then forgot about it completely until it showed up, just the way I had hoped it would.  This has happened the other way around too.   I wanted something soooo bad, thought about it constantly, thought I would die without it, and guess what?  It didn’t happen in the way I had planned, it played out differently –and much better.  Thank goodness.

I can’t tell you how many times I have been rushing off to work  and can’t find my keys for a few minutes. Aghh! So frustrating!  When I finally get in my car and on my way I find that had I left a few minutes earlier I would have been involved in the accident that I am now slowly driving past.  Seems like a stretch  to connect misplacing your keys with missing a traffic situation, but you can’t make this stuff up.  There is so much going on out there that we don’t know about , that we can’t understand.

I have come to the conclusion that there is something to be learned from everything that gets our attention.  And when something comes up over and over again. . .well, I try to take some time to ask my guides or my angels,  “what’s in this for me?”

Oh, and I never forget to say a little thank you for all my gifts.  xo-K

My two cents:  Be clear about what you want, but be flexible about how it manifests.

slow down to speed up

For someone who doesn’t own a TV, I have a pretty good idea of what’s going on.  And I never watch the  “news!”  However, one of the funniest, smartest, sweetest new programs around is Modern Family. Love that show!

One of the characters is a goofy dad who is the biggest dork around, but he always manages to ‘get the job done.’ So, in one episode, the family is running around, trying to get out of the house and on a flight to Hawaii for a big family trip. Mom is going out of her mind trying to hurry everyone along while Dad is calmly walking at a snail’s pace, saying, “fast is slow and slow is fast.” And you know what? He’s right! When you try to push things, speed things up, you trip up and then end up having to repeat each step all over again. Sigh.

When things are going right in my life, doors open as if by magic. The right people show up. The right answers appear. Friendly helpful strangers seem to pop in just when I need them. I love it when that happens! Right now for instance, I’ve been seeing someone whom I really like. It’s new, and we’re probably moving slow by today’s standards.  We’re  playing it sort of old school, and its very sweet. Yeah, I’ve moved into these things faster in the past. . .and that didn’t really work out. Now I’m at the point where I’m not working so hard to “get there.” I’m just enjoying the process.

When someone wants to be with you, they are with you. There are no games, no power struggles. It just flows. Not long ago, I dated someone for a short time who insisted he was busy with his kids on the weekends. I know! Then, while having lunch with a friend, talking about how ‘distant’ this guy seemed, my friend asked how old the kids were. “They’re in their twenties,” I replied. “They’re in college.” Dear P looked at me like, you poor dumb thing. “Trust me,” she said. “He’s not hanging with those kids. At that age, those boys are not all about spending time with Dad.”  Hey! I tend to give parents the benefit of the doubt. . .in all circumstances. I’ve heard more than once, “you don’t have kids, so you can’t understand.”  And they’re right. I don’t always understand, but I do know this: when a relationship — any relationship —is right, it’s simple. Love, C

My two cents: Trust that you’re exactly where you’re supposed to be. Always.

♥♥♥

I don’t know about you but when I feel the need to hurry things along, make things happen, it’s because I feel if I don’t it won’t happen.  When I feel anxious about something there is usually a reason.  Whenever you put crazy nervous energy behind something it usually doesn’t pan out, and it’s probably just as well.

When something is right, it’s right.  It takes on a life of it’s own and you don’t feel any need to make it do or be anything.  I have watched friends throughout the years chase after relationships trying to make this one be the one. Hey, I have done it myself.   Wanting so much to seal the deal, cross it off the list, get it over with and get on to other things.  Really?  That’s how you want your relationship to play out?  What is wrong with enjoying the journey,  watching it unfold, savoring it, enjoying every delicious moment?  Just askin.’

Here’s why I think we do this thing we do, it’s because on some level we know it’s not going to happen.  We know it’s not the job, the house, or the relationship for us. But, we don’t feel it’s really possible to get exactly what we want so we figure, close enough is good enough. Better snatch this one up before someone else who is close enough to it snatches it up first.  (I can’t believe I just said that).

We spend all this time and energy racing around trying to make things happen,  then we’re so surprised and disappointed when they don’t and we have to start all over from square one.  Could things go any slower?

So sometimes you have to stop. . .just stop, take a breath. . .and just know. . .whether it comes from what your Mother said, what your girlfriends said or some voice that you don’t even know said. .  .just have some faith in whatever. There is a divine plan, things are working out for you, so you don’t have to worry.  Aren’t you glad someone knows better than you?  Aren’t you glad someone has your back? xo-K

My two cents:  I am so grateful that when I am spinning out of control there is someone or something to show me the way.

you probably think this blog is about you

Everyone loves Two Girls!!  I am shocked, amazed, awestruck, amused and most of all grateful.  C and I have always written from the heart, and we usually write about what is happening. . . right now.  That being said, everyone who comes in contact with us is potentially Two Girls material.  As much as we try to mix it up, people might come to the conclusion that  we are talking about them in our blog.  This has happen to me on more than one occasion.

Sometimes we talk about dating and relationships, and C, who btw,  in the past hadn’t  shared much of her personal info when she is dating someone new, is now much more open and lets  her dates know who she is and what she does, including the fact that she writes a blog. This is great, but sometimes  I think, don’t tell them… I want to write about them and now they will totally know we’re talking about them. That being said we  have to be a bit creative when we are telling our story as to not incriminate or hurt feelings.

I have heard from quite a few friends and fans of Two Girls when a post really resonated with them, that they were going through something and then read our most recent post and it was about just the thing they were working through.  I love when that happens.  See: we are all more alike than we are different.

We all want to love and be loved.  We all want health and prosperity for ourselves, our family, and our friends.  We have all dealt with heartache, loss, and disappointment. We have all been afraid.  Lost a job or a loved one.  Or maybe just had a crappy day.  Oh, and don’t get me started on Mercury Retrograde.  We all just want to be happy and have a joy filled life.

September has been a hard month.  There’s a lot going on energetically, it is a great time for releasing, so when stuff comes up for you (and it will), make sure you have someone to work through it with.  Oh, and if you want to be part of  Two Girls, we’d love to have you.  Leave us a comment. Maybe you have something to share that would be beneficial for others to hear.  xo-K

My two cents:  If you think this blog is about you, it is probably for you.

♥♥♥

Yeah, K and I have been working on these principles for a while.  We talk about this stuff for hours.  As time goes by it’s become more and more clear that: a) we’re kinda getting better at it even though we have a ways to go, and b) we  totally see these principles at work in our lives and the lives of those around us. Cool!

It’s so true: we need each other. Not just me and K — all of us. We need each other! Not just for sex and safety and survival, and all that primal stuff. We need each other so that we can see each other, see our own Divine spark reflected back in someone’s eyes.  My blog partner and I are mirrors for each other through the good, the bad, and the ugly. . .and then we blog about it.

Yeah, if you know us, chances are that you’ll show up on the “pages” of Two Girls. Not that you will recognize yourself, because that would just not be fair. When we have written about someone without disguise, they knew about it ahead of time and agreed to it.   I have already gone on record that as a writer, my style could be called voyeur. I watch. I watch people, I observe the world.  And then I tell stories.  I know for me, the best part of camping is certainly not the bugs and the dirt . . .it’s the stories around the campfire. Well, the stories and the s’mores and the stars above.

If you think that you see yourself in one of our stories, rest assured you’re not the only one. Are we psychic? Well yeah, sure. But more to the point, we are all sharing an experience here on this groovy little planet and as much as we sometimes think we are all alone, we are not. Do you remember as a teenager, going through some terribly painful initiation on the path to “growing up,”  and thinking what a freak you were, only to hear something, read something, share your story with a trusted friend, then realize that you weren’t alone? We are not alone. We’ve never been alone.

So are we writing about you? Maybe. But more importantly, does what we write mean something to you? That’s the question. Love, C

My two cents: the Divine in me sees the Divine in you and says: Namaste.

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mQZmCJUSC6g

just the facts, ma’am

I envy writers who can make things up. JK Rowling? A total goddess. She created a whole world that is so amazing, I wouldn’t even know where to start. And Stephenie Meyer? Genius. When it comes to writing, I am a voyeur. I look at life, see a story that needs telling, and I tell it. Naturally, names are changed to protect the innocent, but at the core, the story is real. It’s true: life is stranger than fiction.

I’ve been writing a short story for three years. What? Yeah, the first year I was thinking about writing it, the second year I wrote it, and the third year, I danced around cutting out what wasn’t working so the gem inside could shine. I know! Seems like a convoluted process, right? I knew it wasn’t working, I knew I had to get rid of a bunch of stuff, but I wasn’t willing to see it. I was still too in love with my own words to be brutally honest with myself about what had to go. Argh!

Until last week. Last week, a friend asked to see the story I was working on, and thusly flattered, I agreed. Then I realized that I couldn’t show him my shambles of a story yet, I needed to polish it up, make it shine a little. Ah, ego! So, I went to my computer and opened the file, looking at it with new eyes –not my eyes –but maybe the eyes of someone who had never read this story, had no history with it, had no expectations. And then I cut. Ruthlessly, and precisely, I cut. I carved away whole sections without thinking, without getting sentimental about how well written that part of my story was. I think I entered into a sort of trance state. When I came out of it, I looked at what I had done, what my story had become. And I was amazed. What previously had been a cluttered, rambling, densely packed collection of bits and pieces had somehow become clean, simple, honest.

So what’s holding you back? What beautiful gem have you got buried beneath a pile of yesterday’s rubble? What part of your ‘story’ are you not being honest with yourself about? Seriously? Nothing is written in stone. Love, C

My two cents: It’s totally okay to let go of what isn’t working.

♥♥♥

I love getting rid of stuff, letting things go. Maybe that’s why I love to move. Starting with a clean slate. But by the same token I can understand the idea of knowing what’s not working yet, something inside says, just keep it you might need it someday. I don’t like when my life is filled with too much stuff, so much clutter that you can’t see the beauty in what you have. Eliminate all that isn’t necessary, isn’t that what a sculptor does? Chip away at a block of stone until he discovers the work of art that lies within?

C and I are kinda just going with the flow regarding writing this blog, flying by the seat of our pants and I am loving it. Not knowing what’s coming next is kind of exciting. We really don’t know what we’re doing but we have created something that has taken on a life of it’s own and we are just letting it play out organically with no attachment to the outcome. Isn’t that how everything should be?

We have been reading and researching all aspects of blogging, posts, plugins, widgets, etc. I read somewhere that blogs should be about a hundred words less that we have been doing. . .okay, sounds good. I know if I stumble on a blog post that drags on and on I tend to pass on it and move onto something requiring a little less committment . So C and I had no problem cutting down our posts, like I said before, we’re just figuring this all out. No ego attached.

I don’t think it was any coincidence that C met this person who might be interested in her story, the story she had been holding on to for three years at almost the precise moment she became okay with editing her story not because she had to, not because someone told her to but because she knew that it would be the best thing for the story and her ego had nothing to do with it. I just love when things work out like that, but don’t things always work out like that? I am seeing more and more that they do. Amazing what happens when you let go of your ego and fears about how things are going to turn out. xo-K

My two cents: Hold on to your dreams, let go of everything else.

"the way it is"

I haven’t always believed in a benevolent universe; it just isn’t what I was taught about the world. But even as a kid, a scary world view just didn’t ring true to me.  As a child, when a situation didn’t feel good, I would make an escape, usually in one of two ways. Either I would go out and play in the lush forests surrounding my home, hanging out in nature; or I would exercise my active imagination, play with my dolls and go to make-believe land. Either way, I went to my “happy place.”

As a grown up person, it isn’t always convenient to run off to the woods. Sometimes I have to stay in place and “be present” with a situation. But often, looking at “what is” and studying it and hanging out in Whatisville doesn’t make me happy. Why is that? Is it because I’m always desiring the next best thing, or because I’m not allowing happiness in? Ouch!

I have never been satisfied with the statement “that’s just the way it is.” I can’t figure out why anyone would just stop wondering, no question, end of story. I have always loved exploring new ways of doing things, new ways of thinking. Seems to me that “what-is-ness” can leads to shutting the door on future happiness, and why would anyone do that?

Focusing on “what is” is just a habit. A pretty ingrained habit, but a habit nonetheless, which means it can be changed. Relief! But resistance is sneaky. Just last night, I woke up and my mind started churning. Then, I decided to  list everything I am grateful for in my life, starting with A, then B, and so on. I got to about D and got distracted by some little worry, some little “what is.”  After a while I realized what I was doing, and resumed my gratitude list.  By the time I got from A to Z, I was so exhausted from the effort to focus, I fell peacefully back to sleep. Why are we so easily distracted by “the way it is?”

I don’t have it figured out. Yeah, just when I think I’ve got it worked out, I’ll discover a super sneaky belief about what-is, one that is keeping me stuck, one that is overdue for healing, and needs to be let go. Super fun! Love, C

My two cents: it’s okay to visit Whatisville, just don’t move in!

♥♥♥

It has been really challenging for me to not chime in my two cents when someone I care about is arguing for their limitations.  I can see that they want something so badly yet they are putting so much energy into all of the ways they think it won’t work out; wanting their child who recently graduated college to find a great job but affirming there are no jobs out there, wanting to be abundant but affirming no one is getting ahead in this economy. No wonder it takes so long to get what you want,  if you even do.  Sometimes we can be our own worst enemy.

I know I can be. Just today with one little phone call, there I was all pissy, arguing for my limitations.  Damn, I still get caught up sometimes and I know better, which makes it even more frustrating.  Seems like the more I do this stuff the harder it is when I am not on track.  Thrown off of the merry-go-round, straight into the bushes as Abraham would say. Not a fun place to be.

We all have beliefs, things we put in the “just the way it is” category, whether we got them from our parents, school, history, the news, it doesn’t matter.  It’s really easy to get going on some perceived injustice and really dig your heels in. Pretty soon everything in your life is going down the tubes, or so it seems.  I was on a rampage on about four different topics this afternoon.  What a crummy way to spend  my day off.

That’s just the way it is

Some things will never change

That’s just the way it is

But don’t you believe them ~Bruce Hornsby

I always loved that song, and don’t you believe them, great line. When someone says something with such conviction but it really doesn’t resonate with you, and you know in your soul it’s not true, don’t believe it, don’t take their word for it, don’t buy into it.

Nothing is set in stone, and no one can say what’s right and true  for you.  I know what’s right for me and even though I got a little off track today, hey it happens. With a little help from my friends and a little tapping with Brad this evening is feeling much better.  xo-K

My two cents:  As much as we want the things outside of us to be the way we want them to be to make us happy, it’s even cooler when we are happy regardless of what’s going on out there.

get real

 

It’s so nice to get to the point where you can just be yourself, your authentic self.  Just be real.  After all these years I feel like I’m finally getting close.

I work with all women, and I work in a salon. . . full of mirrors.  Ye gads, that could be a recipe for disaster,  a bunch of women, competing with each other plus seeing every imagined flaw staring back at you for eight+ hours a day.  Sounds like it could put your ego to the test, huh?

Lucky for me I work with some of the most beautiful (inside and out) women I could ever hope to work with.  These girls are real, I have worked in a lot of salons,  and I have to tell you we have an amazing, enlightened group of women and I love them all.  No competition here, everyone is so supportive of each other.  I hope they all realize how rare it is and are as thankful as I am to be a part of such an amazing group.

There are days when I don’t feel so great about myself.  It happens less and less, but it still happens.  Growing older, body changes, sometimes it’s hard to love yourself. Hell, I had a hard time loving myself when I was 25 and everything was still where it was supposed to be.  It’s sad to think about that.

  I have decided that I don’t want to be hard on myself, looking at so -called  flaws that are so not who I am.  I want to look at who I really am, a great mom, a great friend, a great stylist, a great person, but even those thing are just a small part of who I am.

We all need to remember, we are not our bodies, we are not what we do for a living, how much money we have, where we live or who we’re married to.  I am  starting to feel like who I really am, the real me, is finally starting to emerge and  I’m looking forward to all the wonderful things life has in store for me.  xo-K

My two cents:  Learn to look in the mirror and see your soul.  There is so much more to you than meets the eye.

♥♥♥

I went to the coast the other day and visited a couple of glass blowing studios. It was amazing! In order to make beautiful, fragile, transparent bowls, vases, lamps, an artist takes a blob of silica, and shoves it into a two thousand degree furnace, and fires it up, red hot. And then after working with it a while, shaping it with tools, reinserting the transforming glass back into the blazing, white hot furnace, he pulls it out of the fire and lets it cool. In the end, all that heat and stress and creative energy results in an exquisitely strong, yet breathtakingly fragile work of art.

I think we are all like that. We’ve been talking lately about our stories, and this made me wonder: what if our stories, the “things that happen” are the fire that shapes our soul into  precious works of art that we can’t even see? Wow!

Every day, we have the chance to look at ourselves and see those extra pounds, the breasts that maybe aren’t as perfect as they were when we were 2o, a few lines that weren’t there yesterday, swear! These are the fires of our shaping.

One of the things I will be forever grateful to K for is encouraging me to study esthetics.  That education not only taught me the basics of great skin care, it taught me to understand beauty, real beauty.  Sometimes beauty is perfection. Sometimes, beauty is a collection of flaws so unique, they create something completely original and fabulous.

Those who work in the beauty business know a little secret that seems to elude about 99.999% of the rest of us: we are all beautiful in our own way. Hey! There is a reason  we women love our salon time. It’s because we get to spend time surrounded by goddess energy! You have to try really hard to walk away from your monthly salon treatment feeling bad about yourself. It’s not that it can’t be done, mind you, but you have to swim upstream against the mighty waters of innate goddess beauty perfection to get there.

We are all works of art in our own way and how we get there is 100 percent a gift from the universe and my mama always taught me that when someone gives you a gift, all you have to say is: thank you. Love, C

My two cents: Just for today, I will love and appreciate the fires that have formed me.

httpvh://www.youtube.com/watch?v=soioqrYorq4

get real

 

It’s so nice to get to the point where you can just be yourself, your authentic self.  Just be real.  After all these years I feel like I’m finally getting close.

I work with all women, and I work in a salon. . . full of mirrors.  Ye gads, that could be a recipe for disaster,  a bunch of women, competing with each other plus seeing every imagined flaw staring back at you for eight+ hours a day.  Sounds like it could put your ego to the test, huh?

Lucky for me I work with some of the most beautiful (inside and out) women I could ever hope to work with.  These girls are real, I have worked in a lot of salons,  and I have to tell you we have an amazing, enlightened group of women and I love them all.  No competition here, everyone is so supportive of each other.  I hope they all realize how rare it is and are as thankful as I am to be a part of such an amazing group.

There are days when I don’t feel so great about myself.  It happens less and less, but it still happens.  Growing older, body changes, sometimes it’s hard to love yourself. Hell, I had a hard time loving myself when I was 25 and everything was still where it was supposed to be.  It’s sad to think about that.

  I have decided that I don’t want to be hard on myself, looking at so -called  flaws that are so not who I am.  I want to look at who I really am, a great mom, a great friend, a great stylist, a great person, but even those thing are just a small part of who I am.

We all need to remember, we are not our bodies, we are not what we do for a living, how much money we have, where we live or who we’re married to.  I am  starting to feel like who I really am, the real me, is finally starting to emerge and  I’m looking forward to all the wonderful things life has in store for me.  xo-K

My two cents:  Learn to look in the mirror and see your soul.  There is so much more to you than meets the eye.

♥♥♥

I went to the coast the other day and visited a couple of glass blowing studios. It was amazing! In order to make beautiful, fragile, transparent bowls, vases, lamps, an artist takes a blob of silica, and shoves it into a two thousand degree furnace, and fires it up, red hot. And then after working with it a while, shaping it with tools, reinserting the transforming glass back into the blazing, white hot furnace, he pulls it out of the fire and lets it cool. In the end, all that heat and stress and creative energy results in an exquisitely strong, yet breathtakingly fragile work of art.

I think we are all like that. We’ve been talking lately about our stories, and this made me wonder: what if our stories, the “things that happen” are the fire that shapes our soul into  precious works of art that we can’t even see? Wow!

Every day, we have the chance to look at ourselves and see those extra pounds, the breasts that maybe aren’t as perfect as they were when we were 2o, a few lines that weren’t there yesterday, swear! These are the fires of our shaping.

One of the things I will be forever grateful to K for is encouraging me to study esthetics.  That education not only taught me the basics of great skin care, it taught me to understand beauty, real beauty.  Sometimes beauty is perfection. Sometimes, beauty is a collection of flaws so unique, they create something completely original and fabulous.

Those who work in the beauty business know a little secret that seems to elude about 99.999% of the rest of us: we are all beautiful in our own way. Hey! There is a reason  we women love our salon time. It’s because we get to spend time surrounded by goddess energy! You have to try really hard to walk away from your monthly salon treatment feeling bad about yourself. It’s not that it can’t be done, mind you, but you have to swim upstream against the mighty waters of innate goddess beauty perfection to get there.

We are all works of art in our own way and how we get there is 100 percent a gift from the universe and my mama always taught me that when someone gives you a gift, all you have to say is: thank you. Love, C

My two cents: Just for today, I will love and appreciate the fires that have formed me.

resistance is futile

It can’t come as much of a surprise to know that I am a closet Trekie.  Of course the original Star Trek episodes are so campy now.  Nevertheless, Captain Kirk was a total babe in the early days of protecting space virtue. Cute! Then, many space frontiers later, came the much more dignified Captain Jean Luc Piccard.

It was during Piccard’s reign that the starship Enterprise encountered a species known as Borg. The Borg’s trademark tag line is: “Resistance is futile. You will be assimilated.”

Abraham-Hicks say that we would manifest our every desire instantly, if we didn’t also have resistance. The trouble is that we say we want something, and we use affirmations and say all the right things, and it still doesn’t appear like magic. So there must be resistance. In a way, the Borg are right. Resistance is futile. Eventually, we’ll get what we want, after we’ve moped around and totally given up the idea of ever having that bright shiny thing. And then shazam! It will appear. Why? Because we gave up wanting it. We also gave up resisting it too, so it was finally able to pop in. Wait. What?

I know. Today at Sunday service, Reverend Lisa was talking about resistance. She said that stress produces resistance.  But, she said, sometimes that event we call stressful is a call to heal something in our life. Our saying NO not only doesn’t help the healing, it also ensures the persistence of the stressor. Call it a boss or a spouse, a neighbor, or parent;  the stress won’t go away until you stop resisting, and simply surrender to the what is.

Of course, it isn’t simply surrender, it’s getting in alignment with what you really want: peace. You can resist, thus defending your right to be outraged, or you can observe the situation, drop the urge to label it “good” or “bad” and simply surrender to being present with it. Ahhh, peace. Resist it and feel the pain again and again, because believe me, until you stop resisting, the Universe will offer you the chance to heal again and again. The Universe is very patient that way.

The extent to which we’re not getting what we want is the extent to which we are resisting it somehow energetically.  Don’t get mad, get in alignment! Love, C

My two cents:  Infinite patience produces immediate results.

♥♥♥

I have to say I was having some resistance writing this post.  I have come back to it about four times and not felt ready to write on it.  Odd considering resistance has been so in my face for the last few weeks.  I am having resistance to resistance.  Nice.  It’s a hard thing to wrap my head around, but I know when I finally get it miracles will happen.

I was listening to an Abraham-Hicks MP3 last week and it was so profound I couldn’t get the idea out of my head.  They said, The ONLY reason you don’t have whatever it is you want is that you have resistance to it. Wow, I had to listen to that over and over again. I started to really notice what I was thinking about.  I have to tell you, as conscious as I try to be and as much as I know about this stuff, I still had thoughts of lack drifting through my mind. No bueno.

What you resist persists. ~Carl Jung.  What you are pushing against, trying to change just keeps on keepin’ on, tricky.  So I guess the best thing to do instead of harping on a problem, worrying until your head hurt is just let it go and be at peace with what is.

If I was entertaining thoughts of why things weren’t working out for me, that is the only reason they aren’t.  That means I am in control of what’s happening and what’s not.  No more blaming anyone or anything if I’m not happy.  I’m in control of what I put my attention on, if I choose to focus on drama and it upsets me, then that’s on me.  I know, at first that almost seems unfair to not be able to assign blame.  But if you take away blame you take back your power.   I think we sometimes forget how powerful we are. xo-K

My two cents:   God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference. ~Reinhold Niebuhr

resistance is futile

It can’t come as much of a surprise to know that I am a closet Trekie.  Of course the original Star Trek episodes are so campy now.  Nevertheless, Captain Kirk was a total babe in the early days of protecting space virtue. Cute! Then, many space frontiers later, came the much more dignified Captain Jean Luc Piccard.

It was during Piccard’s reign that the starship Enterprise encountered a species known as Borg. The Borg’s trademark tag line is: “Resistance is futile. You will be assimilated.”

Abraham-Hicks say that we would manifest our every desire instantly, if we didn’t also have resistance. The trouble is that we say we want something, and we use affirmations and say all the right things, and it still doesn’t appear like magic. So there must be resistance. In a way, the Borg are right. Resistance is futile. Eventually, we’ll get what we want, after we’ve moped around and totally given up the idea of ever having that bright shiny thing. And then shazam! It will appear. Why? Because we gave up wanting it. We also gave up resisting it too, so it was finally able to pop in. Wait. What?

I know. Today at Sunday service, Reverend Lisa was talking about resistance. She said that stress produces resistance.  But, she said, sometimes that event we call stressful is a call to heal something in our life. Our saying NO not only doesn’t help the healing, it also ensures the persistence of the stressor. Call it a boss or a spouse, a neighbor, or parent;  the stress won’t go away until you stop resisting, and simply surrender to the what is.

Of course, it isn’t simply surrender, it’s getting in alignment with what you really want: peace. You can resist, thus defending your right to be outraged, or you can observe the situation, drop the urge to label it “good” or “bad” and simply surrender to being present with it. Ahhh, peace. Resist it and feel the pain again and again, because believe me, until you stop resisting, the Universe will offer you the chance to heal again and again. The Universe is very patient that way.

The extent to which we’re not getting what we want is the extent to which we are resisting it somehow energetically.  Don’t get mad, get in alignment! Love, C

My two cents:  Infinite patience produces immediate results.

♥♥♥

I have to say I was having some resistance writing this post.  I have come back to it about four times and not felt ready to write on it.  Odd considering resistance has been so in my face for the last few weeks.  I am having resistance to resistance.  Nice.  It’s a hard thing to wrap my head around, but I know when I finally get it miracles will happen.

I was listening to an Abraham-Hicks MP3 last week and it was so profound I couldn’t get the idea out of my head.  They said, The ONLY reason you don’t have whatever it is you want is that you have resistance to it. Wow, I had to listen to that over and over again. I started to really notice what I was thinking about.  I have to tell you, as conscious as I try to be and as much as I know about this stuff, I still had thoughts of lack drifting through my mind. No bueno.

What you resist persists. ~Carl Jung.  What you are pushing against, trying to change just keeps on keepin’ on, tricky.  So I guess the best thing to do instead of harping on a problem, worrying until your head hurt is just let it go and be at peace with what is.

If I was entertaining thoughts of why things weren’t working out for me, that is the only reason they aren’t.  That means I am in control of what’s happening and what’s not.  No more blaming anyone or anything if I’m not happy.  I’m in control of what I put my attention on, if I choose to focus on drama and it upsets me, then that’s on me.  I know, at first that almost seems unfair to not be able to assign blame.  But if you take away blame you take back your power.   I think we sometimes forget how powerful we are. xo-K

My two cents:   God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference. ~Reinhold Niebuhr

what's your story?

Have you noticed? Everyone has a story. Actually, my theory is that everyone has two stories.

The first one, your life story, is the story of “where you came from.” You know, the story of your family, the house you grew up in, sibs, parents, family pets, the saga of your first love, etc. So much of this story is colored by memories, both real and imagined.

What I’m beginning to understand, especially as I spend more time with Brad Yates doing tapping exercises, is that so much of our first story, our primal story, goes deep underground. Often, it gets so buried we don’t even know it’s there, until it pops up in behaviors and beliefs we can’t seem to change, no matter how hard we try.

For instance you might believe, way deep down, that you don’t deserve to have enough money to do what you want. Or that money only comes through hard work. You weren’t born with these beliefs, they were programmed into you by the well-meaning beings who fed and clothed you.  They didn’t train you with malice, they were doing the best they could. Nevertheless, these ideas of who you believe you are, are your story. Until you decide they aren’t, which requires honesty and introspection. Are you up for that kind of challenge?

The second kind of story is the daily story. Have you ever noticed that when someone gets all fired up about “something that happened” — a particularly juicy story, they go on and on and on about it? They repeat it to everyone they encounter.

A girl I work with is always up for some kind of drama. Recently I was walking by her desk and she asked me how I was. Naturally, I stopped and answered and then said, “how are you?”  This was her opening. “You won’t believe what happened to me,” she said. “This guy on the corner just asked me for my phone number! Can you imagine that?”  She acted indignant, but it seemed that she somehow also really liked the outrage of it all. “Dear me,” I replied, moving away. “A girl as attractive as you really needs to be careful.”

Another co-worker passed by and she shifted her attention to them, because I obviously wasn’t going to play. As I was walking away, she launched into her story. “You won’t believe what happened to me!”

Yeah, everyone’s got a story, it’s just how we’re wired. The question is, what is the story you tell to anyone who will listen? Love, C

My two cents: make sure the stories you tell yourself have a happy ending!

♥♥♥

I also believe we have two stories, but I think we have the story we are living, what happened in your childhood, or what happened at lunch with your best friend, the story of what is. Then there is the story of how you want your life to be.  We spend a lot of time filling people in on the drama going on in our lives. When someone is filling me in on the laundry list of problems going on in their life, I wonder how many times they have told that story, argued for their limitations, given away their power.

Last week I met a friend of mine for coffee.  We kinda do the same spirit work so it is always really uplifting when we find time to get together.  Anyway, we were discussing an issue about a mutual friend we were both having a problem with.  As we discussed the situation, taking turns telling our version of the story, we were both feeling worse.

We bounced around to other topics, but seemed to keep coming back around to our friend.  Something needed to be worked out, that’s for sure, but we were so stuck in the problem there was no way to see the solution.  Needless to say this was not one of our most uplifting meetings.  Grrrr, seems like we always end up getting together when one of us has something to work on –either an issue with a family member, or a work problem, and we always end up coming to a solution, but this time it was seeming a little hopeless. . . and then we had a breakthrough.

We decided we were going to tell a different story, we had spent the better half of the last few hours talking about what was wrong, we decided to talk about the situation as if it was right.  It was amazing. We held our friend in the light and imagined the problem being resolved drama free.  And you know what?  THAT felt really good! I know it seems a little airy-fairy, but hey if nothing else, we were feeling better.  We saw things how we wanted them to be, we played the wouldn’t it be nice game.  Wow, talk about shifting the energy.

We both were feeling much better which is the reason we have our regular meetings in the first place.  We both had errands to run and things to do before kids needed to be picked up so we parted ways feeling great.

A few days later I got an email from my coffee friend, she told me she talked to our mutual friend and swears her energy has shifted and she is in a much better, more positive place.  Did changing our minds about her and her situation and sending her light shift her?  Who knows, all I know is we all felt better and that’s all that matters.  xo-K

My two cents:  Never tell a story over and over again that doesn’t make you feel good.

watch?v=jcJz-x6idd8

what’s your story?

Have you noticed? Everyone has a story. Actually, my theory is that everyone has two stories.

The first one, your life story, is the story of “where you came from.” You know, the story of your family, the house you grew up in, sibs, parents, family pets, the saga of your first love, etc. So much of this story is colored by memories, both real and imagined.

What I’m beginning to understand, especially as I spend more time with Brad Yates doing tapping exercises, is that so much of our first story, our primal story, goes deep underground. Often, it gets so buried we don’t even know it’s there, until it pops up in behaviors and beliefs we can’t seem to change, no matter how hard we try.

For instance you might believe, way deep down, that you don’t deserve to have enough money to do what you want. Or that money only comes through hard work. You weren’t born with these beliefs, they were programmed into you by the well-meaning beings who fed and clothed you.  They didn’t train you with malice, they were doing the best they could. Nevertheless, these ideas of who you believe you are, are your story. Until you decide they aren’t, which requires honesty and introspection. Are you up for that kind of challenge?

The second kind of story is the daily story. Have you ever noticed that when someone gets all fired up about “something that happened” — a particularly juicy story, they go on and on and on about it? They repeat it to everyone they encounter.

A girl I work with is always up for some kind of drama. Recently I was walking by her desk and she asked me how I was. Naturally, I stopped and answered and then said, “how are you?”  This was her opening. “You won’t believe what happened to me,” she said. “This guy on the corner just asked me for my phone number! Can you imagine that?”  She acted indignant, but it seemed that she somehow also really liked the outrage of it all. “Dear me,” I replied, moving away. “A girl as attractive as you really needs to be careful.”

Another co-worker passed by and she shifted her attention to them, because I obviously wasn’t going to play. As I was walking away, she launched into her story. “You won’t believe what happened to me!”

Yeah, everyone’s got a story, it’s just how we’re wired. The question is, what is the story you tell to anyone who will listen? Love, C

My two cents: make sure the stories you tell yourself have a happy ending!

♥♥♥

I also believe we have two stories, but I think we have the story we are living, what happened in your childhood, or what happened at lunch with your best friend, the story of what is. Then there is the story of how you want your life to be.  We spend a lot of time filling people in on the drama going on in our lives. When someone is filling me in on the laundry list of problems going on in their life, I wonder how many times they have told that story, argued for their limitations, given away their power.

Last week I met a friend of mine for coffee.  We kinda do the same spirit work so it is always really uplifting when we find time to get together.  Anyway, we were discussing an issue about a mutual friend we were both having a problem with.  As we discussed the situation, taking turns telling our version of the story, we were both feeling worse.

We bounced around to other topics, but seemed to keep coming back around to our friend.  Something needed to be worked out, that’s for sure, but we were so stuck in the problem there was no way to see the solution.  Needless to say this was not one of our most uplifting meetings.  Grrrr, seems like we always end up getting together when one of us has something to work on –either an issue with a family member, or a work problem, and we always end up coming to a solution, but this time it was seeming a little hopeless. . . and then we had a breakthrough.

We decided we were going to tell a different story, we had spent the better half of the last few hours talking about what was wrong, we decided to talk about the situation as if it was right.  It was amazing. We held our friend in the light and imagined the problem being resolved drama free.  And you know what?  THAT felt really good! I know it seems a little airy-fairy, but hey if nothing else, we were feeling better.  We saw things how we wanted them to be, we played the wouldn’t it be nice game.  Wow, talk about shifting the energy.

We both were feeling much better which is the reason we have our regular meetings in the first place.  We both had errands to run and things to do before kids needed to be picked up so we parted ways feeling great.

A few days later I got an email from my coffee friend, she told me she talked to our mutual friend and swears her energy has shifted and she is in a much better, more positive place.  Did changing our minds about her and her situation and sending her light shift her?  Who knows, all I know is we all felt better and that’s all that matters.  xo-K

My two cents:  Never tell a story over and over again that doesn’t make you feel good.

living our blog

I have been asked so many times  if we worry we’ll run out of topics to blog about.  Are you kidding me? C and I are living our blog.  This is our lives.  We write about what going on with us, what we’re working on, what we’re observing in other people.  I don’t think we’ll ever run out of things to write about.

C and I talk at least once a day on the phone and have for many years,  it’s like our own mini therapy sessions, in the morning before work and after I drop my daughter off at school.  We talk about our lives, work, boys, money, God.   All the important stuff.  More times than not, we’ll get on a roll, and hit on something really big.  That’s a blog, one of us will say after the other has basically channeled something profound and amazing, (at least it is to us).

We write about what is important to us.  It’s sincere, we are not writing what we think people want to hear, we are not trying to push or sell anything, we are writing for ourselves, period.  And sometimes what we write about comes back to bite one of us. . . right in the ass.

Just last week while we were working on going retro, I started having problems with my computer.  Actually, the issues with the computer came first, which gave us the idea of writing about Mercury Retrograde.  It was happening simultaneously but the more I was focused of the tricks of the transit, the more glitchy my computer got.  Imagine that.

Whether you are writing a blog, writing in a journal or just talking to your friends, whatever you’re putting your attention on is getting bigger, more noticeable, or more clear.  Something pops up for one of us, and bam there’s a blog.  Start writing the blog, bam, more insight on the subject.  Just keeps getting more and more clear, which is a good thing btw. It didn’t seem good when I had to go out and buy a new computer the other day, especially when I wasn’t planning to, but it is what it is.  And I was giving my malfunctioning computer a whole lot of my attention. . . .Just sayin’.

We are here to learn and grow, and I’m not suggesting everyone start blogging, although it is tons of fun;  just be aware of where you are putting your attention.  If you are trying to figure something out, maybe you could try journaling about it.  Sitting with something and writing it down gives you huge insight, at least it does for me.  Energy flows where attention goes, and we are living proof of that.  xo-K

My two cents:  Sometimes things need to get really big so you can see them clearly.

♥♥♥

It wasn’t long after starting to write down all of the things we talk about, that K and I realized that we were living our blog. Come on! Yeah, energy is like that: be careful what you wish for! Nothing like going public with your “conversation” to make you really get that thoughts are energy, and energy creates experience. Oh, and that’s another aspect of walking a spiritual path: Source will call you on your sh*t, every single time!

Of course, we laugh about it. K and I will be talking and she’ll say, “wait, didn’t you just blog about this?” Of course, it will be something to do with walking the talk, and I’ll know I’ve just been busted. Damn!  Like, back at the beginning of our little blogging journey, we wrote “Lighten Up” about looking at your life like a movie, where you get to be the writer, director, producer, and star. Great idea, right? So then one day not long after we published that little gem, I was complaining to K about some minor annoyance that I had managed to blow up into a pretty big deal. “Honey,” she said, “Did you read what you just wrote? You’re the writer of your movie. If you don’t like it, don’t just throw popcorn at the screen. . .change the script!” Damn!

Happens all the time. K has an issue with the fam? No doubt there’s a blog waiting to be written. And I can’t tell you how many times she’ll be working out an issue, writing about it, and shazam! The answer, the Divine Whisper, the cosmic aha moment, comes washing over her and not only does she get the answer she was looking for, but she also gets a stellar blog.

Back in the beginning, we wrote mostly about love, partnerships, romance. Our vision has expanded a little since then. We’ve come to embrace all aspects of love, all aspects of relationship. Hey — technically speaking, we are all in relation to everyone else — and therefore are in relationship with everyone else. Just sayin’. . . .

So anyway, early on, K and I began to notice that the way we worked together on Two Girls was the way that we both envision a “relationship” with a soul mate, a twin flame, the One. We are in agreement that the blog (relationship) is our first concern. If an issue comes up, we decide jointly about the outcome. There is no “I want it my way” discussion. It always comes down to “what is good for the blog?” And that is the primary concern, no matter what.

When it comes to what we write about and how we do it, we work together. She helps me, I help her. It’s more than just friendship, it is about this beautiful work of art that we have created together. There is a deeply spiritual element about it and we both know that it is blessed in a way with both of our efforts, that it could never have been if we had gone at it solo. Truly, where two are more are gathered, miracles happen. Love, C

My two cents: You can live your life through ego, or you can life your life through love; only one will get you what you really want.

going retro

I know it isn’t nice and it really isn’t PC, but I sometimes stereotype people. I know! Sometimes I’ll find myself talking to a new friend and suddenly I’ll ask, “when is your birthday?” And sure enough, they’ll say Leo or Aries or Pisces, and I’ll just laugh. Of course!

Most people don’t admit to believing in astrology, but they will still read their horoscope “just to be safe.” Astrology is an ancient wisdom based on a knowledge that we’re all connected, planets, stars, moons, and all.  We’ll all swimming around in the same cosmic soup! You are no more just your “sign” than you are just your eye or hair color, or the car you drive. But all of these things, they say a little something about you.

I remember the first time I read Linda Goodman’s book Sun Signs. I felt like she had looked right into my soul. How could she know? Well, that’s the beauty of astrology.

Some truths are just undeniable. Libras (the scales) are balance-loving diplomats. Leos are lion hearted heroes. Pisceans have a watery, mystical soul even if they haven’t the slightest idea of what to do with it! I’m a Libra, which is an air sign. You can ask anyone, and they will tell you that I tend to get lost in ideas, the more esoteric, the better. Leos are a fire sign. Every Leo I’ve ever known has been super passionate about everything they do. Stereotype? Maybe. But some truths are true whether you believe them or not.

Beyond personal signs, there are the planets and their influence on our little Earth-bound  lives. Mercury, for instance, rules things related to communication. Since the planet Mercury spins around our sun so fast, it appears to move backward through the sky three or four times a year. Of course it isn’t actually moving backward, it just appears to be. When Mercury goes Retro, electronics like phones and computers tend to go haywire.  At such times, it’s good to slow down a little, be somewhat more reflective.

Rob Breszny is one of my favorite astrologers. He’s funny, irreverent, and very, very accurate. I love to read Rob’s monthly astro-predictions. Many times they are insightful. Often, they make me smile. And when he advises extra caution because Mercury is going Retro, I use the information not to change the way I operate during my daily  life, but to help explain the weirdly unexplainable when it shows up in all its glory.

Another site I love is Maya Del Mar’s Daykeeper Journal. Maya has moved on, but her site is still maintained by a loyal group of very talented astrologers. Mark Husson, hosts a regular show on Hay House Radio. He is by far, one of the kindest, sweetest souls, and his readings are always amazing.

Should you run you life based on your astrological chart? I can’t say for sure, but I do know, that sometimes it’s great to have a ‘heads up’ when things are about to get a little weird! Love, C

My two cents: we have so many wonderful tools at our disposal, why not use them?

♥♥♥

I should have known Mercury Retrograde was upon us when my computer started flickering and then went to black over and over again.  Didn’t even enter my mind that might be the reason, and I know about this stuff. I just started putzing around on my keyboard, trying to do things that I had done before when my computer was acting up, but who am I kidding, I have no idea what I am doing.  Then after an hour on the phone with Anoop from Dell, grrr, can anyone say frustration?  Needless to say I was not happy.

The planet Mercury rules thinking and perception and all types of communication. When Mercury goes retrograde it gives rise to personal misunderstandings. There would be delays, flaws, and hitches in all communication related areas like transportation, trade, etc. Astrologers advise not to make any important decisions while Mercury is retrograde, since it is likely that such decisions will be marred by misinformation, poor communication and careless thinking.~ findyourfate.com

Couldn’t have said it better myself.  I don’t know about you, but when things start going haywire in my life, or when things are just a little out of sync, I wonder, is it me?  Was it something I did or is it forces beyond my control?  Whatever it is, I wanna know.  And when it makes sense to me I feel better.

This morning as I was getting ready for work my friend/client/housekeeper, M, showed up to do her part of our trade. She cleans my house, I make her beautiful.  It’s a fair trade and we are both happy with the arrangement. Anyway, she started on about the cruise that she and her husband were treating her mother to.  It was her mother’s birthday and even though their relationship has been strained ever since M was a child, they were all going on a trip to Alaska.  Let’s just say M has a very loving and forgiving heart and is a much bigger person than me.

M started filling me in on the latest fiasco with her mother: she had received an email stating that she, (mama) was unhappy with one part of what was going to happen in Seattle the night before they left to head to the ship.  Mama drama, to say the least.  M was flustered but trying to stay calm.  I told her,  “Well you know we are in Mercury Retrograde, so just try to keep your cool and just know how that mucks up communication.” She  knows about all this stuff but didn’t realize we were in MR.  This was a sneaky one; almost slipped by me too.

“When’s it going to be over?” she asked.  We looked it up on the computer, she was ready to cancel the cruise when I told her it would be holding strong throughout the whole week  of her vacation.  I told her, “Just be mindful, relax, breathe.”  She said, “Nope, it’s gonna be  me, Valium, and cocktails.”  Hey what ever works.  xo-K

My two cents:  Let the force be with you.

how you do anything is how you do everything

One thing = everything? Really? When K first suggested a month or so ago that any one thing  is like a hologram of how your whole life operates, it seemed like an over-simplification. Could it really be that obvious?

Yesterday, I had an adventure that proved the point beautifully. I was headed out to the Oregon wine country to pick up some wine donations for a fundraiser that I’m planning.  Earlier in the week, I came through a bought of the worst flu ever, and by the time Friday rolled around and I was back to work, I needed some work that didn’t feel like work, but would accomplish an important task, nonetheless. So I called a friend, and off we went to Pinot Noir land.

I just have to say, that I am a pretty organized person. I can simultaneously plan several events, manage a series of executive meetings, and write a newsletter while putting out a few fires, all at the same time. That said, however, I am also somewhat of a non-planner. How can this be? I don’t know; I’m a marvel of complexity.

So, there I was, on a mission to collect bottles of wine armed with a list of tasting rooms, a sure-fire GPS system, and a general idea of the territory.  Not long into our little adventure, the GPS started giving seemingly random directions, first telling us to turn left, then make a  series of U Turns. Dear me, I thought. Maybe I should have been a little more prepared. So we headed for the nearest small town on our list and just as I’m thinking, gosh, wouldn’t it be nice to find the local Chamber of Commerce, guess what? The next block up: Bingo! Chamber of Commerce, where the nice lady pulled out a wine country map and helped us find our first donor of the day. Yay!

Several vineyards later, and we are on a long and empty country road searching for a winery. “We should have passed it by now,” my friend said. The GPS wasn’t speaking. “Wait,” I said. “Let me pull over and take a look at the map.”  So I pull off the road onto the dirt shoulder. “What’s the address we’re looking for?” My co-pilot reads the number off the list then points at the address marker posted at the edge of the drive across from where we were parked. “We’re here,” she said. And we were. I had pulled the car over at the exact right spot, “by accident.”

So, based on the truth that inspired this blog, I would have to say that my general approach to anything I do contains equal parts of fact, intuition, luck, and a little Divine guidance. You? Love, C

My two cents: Don’t get so wrapped up in the plan that you can’t be open to spontaneous joy!

♥♥♥

I was watching Oprah a few weeks ago and Geneen Roth, author of Women, Food and God was her guest.  We all know  Oprah has had  issues with food for a very long time so I thought  it would be interesting to see how she responded to the insights Geneen had to share.  How you do anything is how you do everything she said.  At the time Geneen was talking about  how women eat like they do everything else in their lives.  But it also applies to everything else we do in our lives.   Oprah had an Aha moment and so did I.

I‘ve always been a fan of making lists.  What you want in a job, what you want in a home, what you want in a partner.  Negotiable and nonnegotiable, the things  you can’t live without and the things that would be nice but are not deal breakers.

I recently had a friend who was wanting to start a new  relationship, she was trying to get clear so she made herself a list,  one of the biggies on her list was a man who was successful and made a great living.  In other words  she wanted a man who had money. Nothing wrong with that but you have to be specific.   I  reminded my dear friend  that she might want to add a man who is generous.  A wealthy man who is stingy was not what she was looking for. You have to understand someone who is stingy with their money is stingy with their time, their affection, complements, etc., and who wants that?

Stingy is stingy.  How you do anything is how you do everything.

If you are a worrier, you probably worry about everything.  If you are a planner you probably plan out everything from your work schedule to your kid’s soccer games and orthodontist appointments. I really like to be on time.  Rushing and being late is uncomfortable to me so I make it a point to leave myself plenty of time, to do pretty much everything I do. like It’s funny, how it works, even when I have a client who is late getting to the salon I can usually catch up and be right on time for my next client.

Sometimes life seems random but it really is just perfect.  Things work out the way we set them up, even if you don’t realize it at the time.  My daughter, just like C is very organized.  She writes everything down on her calendar.  She sets things up without even thinking about it, so when she needs something it is there just the way she wants it.  It’s not like she decided one day to get organized she just is.  She likes order.  Me on the other hand, I couldn’t  care less.  I don’t write things down, I kinda like to fly  by the seat of my pants.  That feels more comfortable to me.

Is any of this important?  Who knows, but why people do what they do is interesting to me.  We are not all the same, and we don’t have the same quirks.  Instead of trying to change someone, I guess you just have to find people who don’t drive you completely crazy and just let them be.  Just seems easier that way.  xo-K

My two cents:  Know what you want, know who your are, then just roll with it!

grasping at straws of unhappiness

Have you ever noticed how some people don’t feel good unless they feel bad?  I think it’s an energy thing. We are, at our core, a walking pool of bio-electric energy and research has shown that how we feel affects our heart. And since our heart emits electro-magnetic waves, we have the capacity to connect with other people  by just feeling.  Ever notice how being around an Eeyore type person saps all your strength?

Once again, science has proved some of my favorite “woo-woo” theories to be true! The Heart Math Institute has done studies that have proved that our hearts emit energy so strong that it can affect people around us. And since our hearts can be affected by our emotions, how we feel can literally either bring those around us “up” or “down.” Crazy!

K and I had a great experience at the I Can Do It conference  in Las Vegas a couple of years ago. “Let’s do it!” she said one day during our daily phone-a-thon. “Let’s go to I Can Do It.” So, we did. It was amazing! Now, K has talked about what a great feeling  it is to go to an Abraham-Hicks workshop, and be in a room with 500 like-minded people. At I Can Do It, there are literally thousands. Talk about electricity! Plus, the whole event ‘s like an all-star lineup of all our favorite gurus: Louise L. Hay, Colette Baron Reid, Doreen Virtue, Sonia Choquette,  Wayne Dyer, you name it.

After K and I heard Darren Weissman on the main stage, we decided to attend his break-out session. In case you don’t know, DW has developed a program of love and healing, called “Infinite Love and Gratitude.” So worth checking out!

In the break-out session, the first thing Dr. Darren did, was have all 200 people in the room get out of their chairs and form a giant circle around the perimeter of the room. “We’re all connected,” he said. To prove it, he had everyone hold hands. Between Dr. D and the person next to him, he held up his daughter’s doll, a battery-operated doll that is “wired” to say sweet things like “I love you” when a circuit is completed, usually by a little girl holding the doll’s two hands with her own. In our case, it was a room full of people, connected one to the other, all the way around the room. Once everyone was holding hands, Dr. D completed the circuit by touching the doll’s hand. “I love you,” she said. It was amazing! Hold hands: I love you. Stop connecting: no mas I love you.

So the way I see it, we have a choice. We can stay in a rut of looking at the “bad” things around us, grasping at straws of unhappiness, or we can connect, and share the “I love you.” Love, C

My two cents: life happens. Be happy anyway!

♥♥♥

A few weeks ago C and I were talking about why people are so attached to being unhappy, negative or angry.  You can’t be human and not feel the pull of negativity sometimes, right?  Don’t we all know someone, who, every time you’re around them you,  feel like they sucked the life right out of you?  I have thought about this more times than I can remember. Why does re-telling the story of what went wrong, over and over feel so compelling? Why does feeling angry feel so good  when it is supposed to be a bad thing?

There have been times in the past, when I have been so angry and just gone off, and in the middle of it thought, what am I doing?  You are being a crazy person ranting and raving, what purpose is this going to serve? But at the same time it just felt so good I couldn’t stop myself, and really, I didn’t want to.  It felt so good to get it off my chest or give that person the what-for –I was justified, right?

I have to say this stumped me for years, whether it was me expressing my frustration and anger or being on the receiving end or someone else’s wrath.  Why does it feel so good to feel so bad?

Is it “misery loves company” . . .or is our story how we bond with others. . .whether  it’s via online chat groups,  or in the break room at work? What about when there’s a global disaster such as  9/11, or Haiti, or the BP oil spill?  It’s us against them.  Is unhappiness is the only way we can feel connected?

Something  I found helpful  is what  Abraham-Hicks calls the “Emotional Guidance Scale.”

The Emotional Guidance Scale

1.	Joy/Appreciation/Empowered/Freedom/Love
2.	Passion
3.	Enthusiasm/Eagerness/Happiness
4.	Positive Expectation/Belief
5.	Optimism
6.	Hopefulness
7.	Contentment
8.	Boredom
9.	Pessimism
10.	Frustration/Irritation/Impatience
11.	Overwhelment
12.	Disappointment
13.	Doubt
14.	Worry
15.	Blame
16.	Discouragement
17.	Anger
18.	Revenge
19.	Hatred/Rage
20.	Jealousy
21.	Insecurity/Guilt/Unworthiness
22.	Fear/Grief/Depression/Despair/Powerlessness

The idea here is to find out where you are on the scale and work your way up.  Going up feels better, going down feels worse.  So if you’ve been hanging around at #22 (feeling depressed or powerless), jumping up to #17  (anger) feels pretty good.  Wow, now that makes sense.

The problem is most of the time people don’t like you angry so they try to talk you down from it, diffuse the situation.  No one realizes that the anger you’re now feeling is better than the depression you were feeling.  Maybe we need to allow people to feel the anger and  work through it  instead of trying to talk them out of it and pushing them back into depression or helplessness.

Feel what you are feeling, when you are feeling it? What an interesting concept. Maybe if we allowed ourselves and others to do that we would have less random irrational lashing out, road rage, or getting the life sucked out of you when you go into a meeting or have lunch with a friend who’s having a bad day.  Just a thought.  xo-K

My two cents:  You can always find your way to a better feeling place.

the blog is boss

It’s amazing, isn’t it? Last year, when I met someone who said they wrote a blog, I was all, “Um, okay. . .Good for you!” Now, I write a blog, and I feel like I’m right on the leading edge of a something so big there isn’t even really a name for it. Gotta love it!

One of my best and dearest friends wanted to know why I wasn’t writing something more ‘important,’ more ‘literary,’ than a blog. Are you kidding me? More people have read my seven-month old blog than have collectively read any of the fancy pants award-wining short stories I’ve written in the last 20 years! As a writer, I have to say, it’s nice to win a prize. Totally. I also have to admit to the little thrill I get when I watch our Two Girl stats climbing up, up, up. Totally!

It’s a brave new e-world, baby. Newspapers are going the way of dinosaurs. Magazines are an endangered specie. Television? So last century.

Some of my favorite blogs are not just content-rich, but they are pretty to look at, too. Technology has come a long way since the early days. Oh, sure, K and I  still have to roll up our sleeves and dive into the code tank from time to time, but there are some really pretty sites out there that don’t required a degree in rocket science to create.  They are kitchy, creative, and totally cool.

Hey! It’s a reality show world. What might have been considered navel-gazing before is now entertainment. There is so much great content online, and more appearing everyday.

Pioneer Woman has a very groovy site, and it is a completely original spin on domestic goddess-ery. Ree Drummond rocks the blogosphere with panache, style, and sassy ranch chic. Plus, she has a never ending source of material: the cowboy & cowgirl life. Delish!

Another must view blog in this girls’ opinion, is Chickens in the Road.  This is yet another example of an enterprising woman who shares her unique perspective with the world.  Suzanne McMinn has created a site so real it moves beyond words and pictures, and sometimes shows up on YouTube.  I can’t even tell you how much I love to click in and catch up on the latest gossip from the farm, feisty chickens, baby goats, and all.

Of course, the latest blogger to take the world by storm is Caitlin Boyle, the girl who started putting Post-It notes everywhere, telling women how fabulous they are and how beautiful. Her blog is called Operation Beautiful, and just hit the Today Show. To me, this is the genius of the Internet. Have a really good idea and want to share it? It’s never been easier, so what are you waiting for? Love, C

My two cents: faith is knowing that when you come to the edge of everything you know for sure and take a step, you will either step on solid ground, or will grow wings to fly.

♥♥♥

There is something so amazing about the time we’re in.  All the rules are changing.  You no longer need a publishing house to tell you whether or not you can write or if they think anyone cares about what you have to say.  There are thousand of people now expressing their thoughts and opinions via this new blog world who would never have been heard from before.  I have to say until C and I  dove head first into this blog community, I had no idea what a huge world it truly is. There are “Bloggies,” much like the Academy Awards for bloggers, and conferences that are sold out months in advance. Who knew?

There is something so empowering about being able to self publish. C has been in the writing world for many years so she knows how it goes.  I, on the other hand, knew nothing about writing, and I would never be so presumptuous to assume I could even try.  Yeah, I’ve got a lot to say, but no training.  Never thought that writing was even an option for me.  Don’t get me wrong, I need a little help from my friend/editor, but come on, how cool is it that there is now a forum for people to not only express themselves for themselves, and also to share with others who might be going through something similar?

I remember way back when I was living in Los Angeles, I had so many friends who were struggling musicians or actors. Some of my friends were so very talented but just couldn’t get the “break” they needed.   Seemed like a no win situation: can’t get a gig unless you have an agent, can’t get an agent unless you have  a gig.  Seemed like only the very lucky ones, the chosen few were signed to a contract.  That’s not the case anymore, people are becoming overnight sensations via reality TV and Youtube.  Sure some of those “stars,” are 14 minutes into their 15 minutes of fame, but some of them, wow, thank goodness someone plucked them out of obscurity for our benefit.

Great talent is coming from the most random places. Stay at home moms are becoming famous and making a great living while staying home caring for their family and homes.  C mentioned earlier The Pioneer Woman who is  queen of her castle and has created a career out of sharing her wit, wisdom and some kick-ass recipes.   Bravo girl!

Look at Stephanie Meyer, she was a stay at home mom who had never so much as written a short story, but after a dream she had one night, created the phenomenon know as The Twilight Saga.  Amazing.

There are so many ways to be creative, so many ways to express yourself and even make a living at it.  Be open to anything, who knows, maybe some day your work could feel like play, and you could make more money then you ever dreamed, doing something you would do for free.  xo-K

My two cents:  “Do what you love, the money will follow.” ~Marsha Sintar

learn something new

I have learned so much since C and I started this little blog.  C has been writing for years, novels, book reviews, grant proposals, journal entries, you name it,  she has written it.  Me, I just had stories, years and years of stories. In my profession I have pretty much heard everything, and human behavior is so interesting to me, but I never thought I could write about my experiences, my interactions or my life.  And if I did, who would want to read it?

Writing has been so healing for me, and although I am not the greatest at getting my point across and not rambling on and on in one never-ending sentence, I think I am getting better.  Thanks to C by the way, who will cut my commas off at the pass when I get too rambly. (Yeah, yeah, I know that’s not a word.)

I am learning so much everyday, we both are.  It’s amazing some of the stuff we have come across that we had never even heard of before.  Headers and widgets and codes, oh my.  I am working parts of my brain that have never been worked before, it’s fun and it feels good. Neither of us knew anything about designing a website or writing a blog, we just got an idea and it took on a life of its own.  Even though initially we weren’t exactly sure what we wanted, we knew what we didn’t want, and as we went along we learned what worked and what didn’t.

I think the best part of this whole adventure is learning to do something new, something so completely out of my comfort zone.  I have been a stylist almost my entire working life.  It was just something I could always do, it was fun, it was easy, it was fulfilling, and still is and I love it, don’t get me wrong.  I am also loving learning to do something so totally different.

One day, I was trying to change the artwork on the header, and it’s all in code,  like another language that I have never seen before. After many hours of reading, researching and trial and error, I figured it out.  I got such a kick out of that, I was doing the happy dance all around my living room.  What a feeling.  Another thing that is new to me is working with a partner. I have always worked solo so I’m sure there were so many ways that this could have gone wrong, but it has been the best. C and I are in agreement that neither of us would have been able to do this in the way we have without the other; where one of us gets discouraged or just plain busy with our day jobs, the other takes over.  Perfect.

So take it from us: if we can do it, so can you.  Try something new, learn something new.  It’s good for your soul, it’s good for your brain, and it’s good for your self-esteem.  Is there anything you’ve ever dreamed about doing?  Take an art class, learn to salsa, go back to college, whatever it is just go for it.  You might end up creating something amazing.  Enjoy, xo-K

My two cents:  You have no idea what life has in store for you.

♥♥♥

Long ago, I decided that there are two kinds of people in the world. Type One picks a decade they like and sticks with it, not matter what. Same hair, same clothes, same world-views. Then, there is Type Two Girls: always ready to try something new, going for that shot of WOW when they experience something fresh. Cool!

Yeah, the world is changing fast. The speed of information coming at us can be overwhelming. I totally get that. I heard recently that because we have access to more information that ever before in the history of the world –if you’re not learning something new, you’re not just standing still, you’re moving backwards.

About ten years ago I met a charming couple from Holland. The were lovely and worldly and had grown children and grandchildren. The newfangled  Internet was becoming all the rage and even though no one had quite figured out what it was good for, everyone was still quite excited about it. Email was eclipsing the cell phone as a way to connect. I remember smiling at my quaint neighbors when they declared that had no interest in learning “that computer stuff.”

Flash forward a decade and its safe to say the world is not the same place. String theory expert and physicist Michio Kaku says that all these social, cultural, and scientific changes are actually part of the evolution of the human race into something. . .greater. Cool!

I just met someone at a business meeting, who identified herself as a communication director. “Great!” I replied. “What is your social media policy?” She gave me a slight frown and shook her head. “Oh, I don’t do that,” she replied. “Maybe I’ll hire someone to do it.”

I understood what she meant. A year ago I reluctantly joined the facebook revolution and maybe posted once a week. I just didn’t see the point. Now, K and I post daily. I tell anyone who will listen that it’s a newer, better way to stay in touch. It’s just a learning curve, that’s all. Nothing scary under the bed or hiding in the Internet closet, my dears.

Admittedly, K is better at the technical stuff than I am. I tend to get all itchy and tossed out of the Vortex and into the bushes when it comes to code and programming. But that’s the beauty of this partnership. We both have skills, that when blended, are better than we would be alone.  We came to realize early on that our  main subject is relationships — every kind under the sun — even two girls writing a blog. Love, C

My two cents: Flexing your brain muscle is a great way to stay vibrant, sexy, and young!

unreal

I love jumping feet first into something others may consider unreal. Take for instance, acupuncture. There was a time,when I lived in Pennsylvania with Amish neighbors to one side, and a Dutch tobacco trader on the other. Back then, I was experiencing both insomnia and an irregular cycle. Also maybe of significance, Haley’s comet hung in the sky, like a bridal veil in my sleepless early mornings. What else could I do? I went to an acupuncturist. She cured both the  off-cycle and the sleeplessness with tiny needles, strategically placed.

According to some sources, there is no anatomical or medical reason for acupuncture points or meridians. Some sources suggest that is is all mind over matter. But I had no agenda or belief whether or not the needles would work, they just did; my periods snapped back into sync, and I stopped waking in the night to stare at the comet. End of story. Sort of.  There are many things that work for no apparent reason. Hypnosis. Astrology. Quantum physics.

A couple of years ago, a friend of a friend introduced me to “this tapping craze.” Actually, it’s called Emotional Freedom Technique, or EFT, or simply, Tapping. Critics call it a pseudo-science. Naysayers insist that it creates a placebo effect, “fooling” gullible people into thinking they’ve been “cured” of whatever condition they’ve imagined. Skeptics say it isn’t “real” because it can’t  be tested scientifically. Whatev. I just listened to a noted physicist say that based on new scientific evidence about the nature of matter in the universe, practically everything printed in any science books up to now, is wrong. Just sayin.’

EFT works on the same principles as acupuncture, that is, working with the body’s energy meridians, to release false beliefs that lock ideas into the body at a cellular level. So anyway, there I was, bopping around YouTube a couple of weeks ago, and discovered a guy named Brad Yates, posting little ten minute vids on various tapping topics. I really liked his style and his casual sense of humor (code: the guy doesn’t take himself too seriously), and I especially like the fact that he has worked with Joe Vitale, of The Secret, so the guy runs in crowds that I know and respect. So I started tapping. Every morning, every night. I was telling K one day that I was tapping merrily along with Bad Brad one day, and I don’t even remember the topic, but suddenly, I started to get all emotional. I hadn’t realized that I had any “stuff” around what we were tapping about, but apparently, my body knew differently.

So, does EFT “really” work? For me it does. For now. Is it a cure all? Probably not, but it is a tool, and as long as I feel I’m getting results and no one is getting hurt, I’ll be tap-tap-tapping away. Love, C

My two cents: having an open mind can take you places you never dreamed of before!

♥♥♥

Who can say what’s real and what’s not?  I am at a point where if something shows up for me,  and I notice it, there’s a reason and there is probably something in it for me.  I had never heard of “tapping” before C started talking about it a few weeks ago.  I am always game to try something new, and since there were affirmations involved I figured it must be somewhat helpful and uplifting, right?

I have to admit, the first few times I watched Tappin’ Brad on YouTube I felt kinda silly, trying to keep up with the tapping patterns felt a little like learning to line dance or something  for the first time; turning left while everyone else is turning right.  But then maybe that’s the idea. Besides hitting the meridian points while tapping, which I’m sure does something, the tapping is a distraction, or at least it is to me.  When I am repeating after Brad that I am amazing and prosperous, my mind is not screaming, “no you’re not!” I’m so busy trying to follow along with his tapping sequence, the affirmations slip right in and  my mind isn’t arguing  the point. Brilliant. Not to mention that I actually feel really good after a few minutes of tapping and affirming. And that works for me, no matter what science has to say about it.

So maybe we just need to do whatever works for us and not worry so much about what other people think or say about it.  Don’t worry that it looks silly or others think it is a bunch of hocus pocus, you might just be onto something new.  I have been telling my dad for years: “You need to learn to relax, you need to breathe, you should learn to meditate.”  My father has heart disease so stress and worry are not his friends. Not until his HMO started promoting relaxation and meditation did he start to think that there might be something to what I have been telling him.  He has always thought I was just a little too out there and that I didn’t know anything. Whatever.

So what do you believe in?  Are you open to new  ideas?  The world is transforming  fast and it’s a good thing, really it is.  I know for me, I am going to keep learning, keep expanding, and whether I am tapping, or chanting, or just being still and breathing, I am going to keep my mind open to all the good that is coming to me.  xo-K

My two cents:   “Strawberry fields, nothing is real, and nothing to get hung about.” ~The Beatles.

unreal

I love jumping feet first into something others may consider unreal. Take for instance, acupuncture. There was a time,when I lived in Pennsylvania with Amish neighbors to one side, and a Dutch tobacco trader on the other. Back then, I was experiencing both insomnia and an irregular cycle. Also maybe of significance, Haley’s comet hung in the sky, like a bridal veil in my sleepless early mornings. What else could I do? I went to an acupuncturist. She cured both the  off-cycle and the sleeplessness with tiny needles, strategically placed.

According to some sources, there is no anatomical or medical reason for acupuncture points or meridians. Some sources suggest that is is all mind over matter. But I had no agenda or belief whether or not the needles would work, they just did; my periods snapped back into sync, and I stopped waking in the night to stare at the comet. End of story. Sort of.  There are many things that work for no apparent reason. Hypnosis. Astrology. Quantum physics.

A couple of years ago, a friend of a friend introduced me to “this tapping craze.” Actually, it’s called Emotional Freedom Technique, or EFT, or simply, Tapping. Critics call it a pseudo-science. Naysayers insist that it creates a placebo effect, “fooling” gullible people into thinking they’ve been “cured” of whatever condition they’ve imagined. Skeptics say it isn’t “real” because it can’t  be tested scientifically. Whatev. I just listened to a noted physicist say that based on new scientific evidence about the nature of matter in the universe, practically everything printed in any science books up to now, is wrong. Just sayin.’

EFT works on the same principles as acupuncture, that is, working with the body’s energy meridians, to release false beliefs that lock ideas into the body at a cellular level. So anyway, there I was, bopping around YouTube a couple of weeks ago, and discovered a guy named Brad Yates, posting little ten minute vids on various tapping topics. I really liked his style and his casual sense of humor (code: the guy doesn’t take himself too seriously), and I especially like the fact that he has worked with Joe Vitale, of The Secret, so the guy runs in crowds that I know and respect. So I started tapping. Every morning, every night. I was telling K one day that I was tapping merrily along with Bad Brad one day, and I don’t even remember the topic, but suddenly, I started to get all emotional. I hadn’t realized that I had any “stuff” around what we were tapping about, but apparently, my body knew differently.

So, does EFT “really” work? For me it does. For now. Is it a cure all? Probably not, but it is a tool, and as long as I feel I’m getting results and no one is getting hurt, I’ll be tap-tap-tapping away. Love, C

My two cents: having an open mind can take you places you never dreamed of before!

♥♥♥

Who can say what’s real and what’s not?  I am at a point where if something shows up for me,  and I notice it, there’s a reason and there is probably something in it for me.  I had never heard of “tapping” before C started talking about it a few weeks ago.  I am always game to try something new, and since there were affirmations involved I figured it must be somewhat helpful and uplifting, right?

I have to admit, the first few times I watched Tappin’ Brad on YouTube I felt kinda silly, trying to keep up with the tapping patterns felt a little like learning to line dance or something  for the first time; turning left while everyone else is turning right.  But then maybe that’s the idea. Besides hitting the meridian points while tapping, which I’m sure does something, the tapping is a distraction, or at least it is to me.  When I am repeating after Brad that I am amazing and prosperous, my mind is not screaming, “no you’re not!” I’m so busy trying to follow along with his tapping sequence, the affirmations slip right in and  my mind isn’t arguing  the point. Brilliant. Not to mention that I actually feel really good after a few minutes of tapping and affirming. And that works for me, no matter what science has to say about it.

So maybe we just need to do whatever works for us and not worry so much about what other people think or say about it.  Don’t worry that it looks silly or others think it is a bunch of hocus pocus, you might just be onto something new.  I have been telling my dad for years: “You need to learn to relax, you need to breathe, you should learn to meditate.”  My father has heart disease so stress and worry are not his friends. Not until his HMO started promoting relaxation and meditation did he start to think that there might be something to what I have been telling him.  He has always thought I was just a little too out there and that I didn’t know anything. Whatever.

So what do you believe in?  Are you open to new  ideas?  The world is transforming  fast and it’s a good thing, really it is.  I know for me, I am going to keep learning, keep expanding, and whether I am tapping, or chanting, or just being still and breathing, I am going to keep my mind open to all the good that is coming to me.  xo-K

My two cents:   “Strawberry fields, nothing is real, and nothing to get hung about.” ~The Beatles.

 

 

friendly, helpful people~

Isn’t it funny how you can be going merrily along, most aspects of your life are going well enough, and even though there is this one thing that isn’t perfect you just sort of limp along at less than 100 percent? And then one day, it changes and everything seems a little brighter. Love that!

When I moved into my little condo on the river, it was perfect. My unit is situated so it lets in lots of light from windows on three sides of the house, even though the actual living space isn’t huge, it feels wide open. From the living room, I can see trees and flowers planted all around, as well as the constant parade of people who come from all over to walk the shores of the river.

About nine months ago, the vertical blinds over the patio window stopped working. I noticed that the brackets that hold them up were pulling away of the wall. Being my father’s daughter, I inspected the hardware and could see that they had been installed rather sloppily. In fact, the blinds were barely holding and could break away at any time. Instead of two bolts holding each bracket, just one bolt had been drilled into the plasterboard. I stopped opening the blinds, waiting to repair them. Being rather handy and the daughter of a builder, I tried to fix them myself, but the blinds were too big and unwieldy for one person to repair alone. I told my landlord about the problem, and he came by one day. His solution: he drilled a bigger, single screw into each bracket. This didn’t really work. I told a friendly neighbor about it, and his idea was to re-engineer the whole setup, and at a price by the way, that involved a “trade” that I didn’t want to get mixed up with. I passed. Another friend took a look at it recently, and remarked that he could “probably” fix it. Come on!

Yesterday, I took a day off from work to enjoy the summer day and make a long weekend. I called my friend P, and suggested we go to lunch at a place across the river. We had a great lunch and them came back to my place. “I could fix that,” P said. I knew she could, P had built an entire house with her former husband. “When?” I replied. “Now,” she said. “You got tools?” Oh yeah, I got tools. Long story short and four hours later, I now have beautiful summer light streaming into my living room once again. As I sit writing this post, I’m looking out at my sweet little garden of potted pink geraniums and angel statues, full of joy and gratitude for the friendly, helpful people in my life. Love, C

My two cents: we’re always surrounded by angels, our work is to let them in!

♥♥♥

In the past I have had a hard time asking for help. I never asked for a ride to the airport, a lift to pick up my car from the mechanic, a run to the store when I was feeling sick. I don’t know why, maybe it was that I didn’t want to inconvenience anyone, didn’t want to owe anyone, didn’t want to need anyone. I don’t want to be like that anymore. I don’t want to feel obligated if someone offers to help me. I love to help people if I can, and I never feel like I need to be paid back. So I’m not exactly sure why I felt that others would feel that way.

Everyone wants to be of service, it feels good to be able to help someone who needs help. So as important as it is to be helpful to others, I think it is just as important to allow others to be helpful to you, and to really be in appreciation when they do so. It’s a win-win.

I always tell C when she is planning a big event, “Pray for friendly helpful people.” She is always so busy running around trying to do everything herself; asking the universe to send her the right volunteers just makes things so much easier. I need to remember that in my own life too.

Being a single mom, I am so used to doing everything myself. I’m Mom, Dad, breadwinner, chauffeur, everything. I am lucky I do have a wonderful family who is there for me. But sometimes with them I feel there is a price tag attached, a debt owed that I will be forced to pay back somewhere down the road. Sometimes it seems like they want me to feel that I am ungrateful for what has been done for me so then it doesn’t seem worth it. Ever felt that way?

I know I need to give myself a break, not feel I have to do everything and be everything to everyone. I really want to get to the place where I know that all of my needs are met, everything works out the way it should, and if I need anything at all I can just pick up the phone, or say a little prayer and any assistance I need will be right there, and I will take it. xo-K

My two cents: We never have to feel guilty when we need a little help from our friends.

codependent no more!~

Can we all just make a pact that we are no longer going to feel responsible for how anyone else feels about anything?  Not our kids, not our spouse,  not our friends, not our boss or our coworkers, not anyone?  Pinky promise?  Seriously,  are we done yet?

This is such a HUGE one for me, and I have to tell you,  a real sneaky one.  I thought I was so over care-taking,  I made a declaration when my daughter was born –yea, childbirth is a time when you get really clear –I told everyone whom I came in contact with, that anyone over five years of age was, as far as I was concerned, on their own.  And I was serious.  All my friends who had enjoyed my codependent tendencies were NOT happy with that revelation.

Well, my daughter is almost sixteen and I am still working on this.  Really?  I do work in a service profession, but, come on, I am still feeling responsible for how others feel and trying to make it better for them.  Like that is even possible.

I know that part of this is just being a woman, it’s in our DNA: woman=caretaker, but this is bigger.  Why do I feel responsible for what everyone around me feels or experiences, and why do I feel it is my responsibility to fix it?

It’s kinda weird, my daughter is away at camp this week, she has been away before so that is no big deal, but never without me being able to shoot her a text or call her if I need to check in.  I didn’t think it was going to be a big deal for me but it is.  I can’t care-take her,  even if I want to, I can’t.  And by the way, in case it matters, she doesn’t need me to.  So I just got it, maybe it is more about me, this codependent thing.  Maybe it is not so much about people needing me to care for them, but me needing them to need me.

OMG, like I have said before if you don’t journal you should.  I am writing this and I had no idea what my real feelings were about this until I started writing about it.  Amazing. I started this with the intention of making a vow that I would no longer feel responsible for how others feel, and now I am seeing that I do it because there is something in it for me.  And I have to say, in almost all instances when people do things, it’s always because there is something in it for them. . .you see, it’s sneaky, but that’s a WHOLE other post.

So I am going to end this with a question, and I am going to go do some meditation and work on it myself and I will check back in.  Do you need others to depend on you?  Does it make you feel good, needed, whole, whatever, if someone needs you to fix their life/problems for them? Just sayin’.  xo-K

♥♥♥

If you’ve ready many of these posts, you know that K and I talk. Everyday.  Usually, when something is “up” for one of use, the other isn’t far behind. We’re kinda in synch that way.  And this is the thing that we’ve noticed in our “work” ~ we have become so ultra sensitive to energy, that we know when something is up, often before the other is even aware.

So anyway, one morning this week when I was still all buzzed from my Abraham workshop, and K was just beginning to catch the energetic wave of hers, we had what I consider a breakthrough healing, while talking on the phone. I was talking about my ongoing challenge at work, and she casually mentioned that wily “C” word: codependent.

Can I just say? My whole body responded to the word: my heart just sort of flowered open, and I felt a zap of Kundalini heat snake up my spine. Eureka! The behavior that was bugging me so much wasn’t my co-worker: it was me. I had jumped into an old, familiar codependent role, doing everything short of spinning on my head in a  diamond-crusted tutu in order to make the other person happy. Come on!

This all made sense in a whole new way at the Unity Service I attended this morning. Can I just say? I love Reverend Lisa! There she was, talking her talk, and I just sat there,  soaking up the wisdom, when suddenly I felt a jolt of electricity that said: pay attention.

“We live in a world of cause and effect,” she said. “But I don’t have to let your “cause” determine my “effect.”  In other words, we get to choose, at every moment what is real and true and right for us. Rev. Lisa went on to say that we are co-creators with the energy of the Universe, and that we can choose whatever effect any cause will have on us, simply by determining what is “true” for us. Hello, co-dependence? Are you listening sweetie?

“It’s all about faith,” she said. “We can choose to believe that we live in a benevolent universe, and rest our faith there. The question is,” she said, “what do you choose to have faith in?” She explained we are all spiritual creatures, and love is our nature. We can choose to take on other people’s wounds if it happens to correspond to a belief that we don’t deserve love, money, or happiness. . .or not.

So the question is: do I choose to see myself as a being expressing divine love and perfection, an active co-creator with the all that is, and therefore to allow the truth of my being, which is love, in? Or not? Yeah, big stuff. Love, C

My two cents: choosing to be codependent no more is an act so huge it can affect the spin of entire galaxies.

0=-

codependent no more!~

Can we all just make a pact that we are no longer going to feel responsible for how anyone else feels about anything?  Not our kids, not our spouse,  not our friends, not our boss or our coworkers, not anyone?  Pinky promise?  Seriously,  are we done yet?

This is such a HUGE one for me, and I have to tell you,  a real sneaky one.  I thought I was so over care-taking,  I made a declaration when my daughter was born –yea, childbirth is a time when you get really clear –I told everyone whom I came in contact with, that anyone over five years of age was, as far as I was concerned, on their own.  And I was serious.  All my friends who had enjoyed my codependent tendencies were NOT happy with that revelation.

Well, my daughter is almost sixteen and I am still working on this.  Really?  I do work in a service profession, but, come on, I am still feeling responsible for how others feel and trying to make it better for them.  Like that is even possible.

I know that part of this is just being a woman, it’s in our DNA: woman=caretaker, but this is bigger.  Why do I feel responsible for what everyone around me feels or experiences, and why do I feel it is my responsibility to fix it?

It’s kinda weird, my daughter is away at camp this week, she has been away before so that is no big deal, but never without me being able to shoot her a text or call her if I need to check in.  I didn’t think it was going to be a big deal for me but it is.  I can’t care-take her,  even if I want to, I can’t.  And by the way, in case it matters, she doesn’t need me to.  So I just got it, maybe it is more about me, this codependent thing.  Maybe it is not so much about people needing me to care for them, but me needing them to need me.

OMG, like I have said before if you don’t journal you should.  I am writing this and I had no idea what my real feelings were about this until I started writing about it.  Amazing. I started this with the intention of making a vow that I would no longer feel responsible for how others feel, and now I am seeing that I do it because there is something in it for me.  And I have to say, in almost all instances when people do things, it’s always because there is something in it for them. . .you see, it’s sneaky, but that’s a WHOLE other post.

So I am going to end this with a question, and I am going to go do some meditation and work on it myself and I will check back in.  Do you need others to depend on you?  Does it make you feel good, needed, whole, whatever, if someone needs you to fix their life/problems for them? Just sayin’.  xo-K

♥♥♥

If you’ve ready many of these posts, you know that K and I talk. Everyday.  Usually, when something is “up” for one of use, the other isn’t far behind. We’re kinda in synch that way.  And this is the thing that we’ve noticed in our “work” ~ we have become so ultra sensitive to energy, that we know when something is up, often before the other is even aware.

So anyway, one morning this week when I was still all buzzed from my Abraham workshop, and K was just beginning to catch the energetic wave of hers, we had what I consider a breakthrough healing, while talking on the phone. I was talking about my ongoing challenge at work, and she casually mentioned that wily “C” word: codependent.

Can I just say? My whole body responded to the word: my heart just sort of flowered open, and I felt a zap of Kundalini heat snake up my spine. Eureka! The behavior that was bugging me so much wasn’t my co-worker: it was me. I had jumped into an old, familiar codependent role, doing everything short of spinning on my head in a  diamond-crusted tutu in order to make the other person happy. Come on!

This all made sense in a whole new way at the Unity Service I attended this morning. Can I just say? I love Reverend Lisa! There she was, talking her talk, and I just sat there,  soaking up the wisdom, when suddenly I felt a jolt of electricity that said: pay attention.

“We live in a world of cause and effect,” she said. “But I don’t have to let your “cause” determine my “effect.”  In other words, we get to choose, at every moment what is real and true and right for us. Rev. Lisa went on to say that we are co-creators with the energy of the Universe, and that we can choose whatever effect any cause will have on us, simply by determining what is “true” for us. Hello, co-dependence? Are you listening sweetie?

“It’s all about faith,” she said. “We can choose to believe that we live in a benevolent universe, and rest our faith there. The question is,” she said, “what do you choose to have faith in?” She explained we are all spiritual creatures, and love is our nature. We can choose to take on other people’s wounds if it happens to correspond to a belief that we don’t deserve love, money, or happiness. . .or not.

So the question is: do I choose to see myself as a being expressing divine love and perfection, an active co-creator with the all that is, and therefore to allow the truth of my being, which is love, in? Or not? Yeah, big stuff. Love, C

My two cents: choosing to be codependent no more is an act so huge it can affect the spin of entire galaxies.

0=-

let go, let God

You know how when you hear or read something that is so big, you can hardly get your head around it, and you need to let it soak in and marinate for a couple of days?  Yeah, the Abraham workshop was like that for me. There was so much good stuff coming so big and so fast, after a while, I stopped saying “wait, I have to remember this,” and just let it wash over me.

This morning while getting ready to go take in a Unity service, I was listening to an MP3 download of another Abraham workshop. And just like that, an idea clicked. It keeps playing over and over in my mind and I feel like I keep spiraling up, up, up, with it. One of the amazing things they said, was toward the end of the day. Be easy, they said. Relax. “Just know that you’re swimming in an ocean of well-being,” they said. My whole body just let go when they said that. Think about it: an ocean of well-being. Oceans are pretty big. Imagine floating in a warm, vast, ocean of well-being without beginning or end. Yeah.

The other thing they said was about getting in the Vortex. All that we desire is in there, so it’s a pretty groovy place. Now before, I had thought about “getting in” as getting in so I could get my stuff. But this time, Abraham said you don’t “go” there, it isn’t something that takes a effort to “get” in, as if: when you meditate hard enough or long enough, if you study hard enough, if you work out just the right combination of thinking/doing, you’ll get it. Abraham said that you relax into it. Because when you’re relaxed, when you’re happy, in that place of appreciation and joy, you’re so close to being in alignment with what you want that it just happens without effort. It’s about letting go.

I’ve been on Match dot com for a couple of months, and have had various experiences that I’ve shared on these “pages.” Hey! Everything that happens to Two Girls is fair game for our beloved blog! Anyway. Recently, I decided to revise my thinking about the process. Instead of doing it to “get”  someone, I decided to be easy about it and do it for fun. Almost immediately, I met someone who finds me just as interesting as I find him. Yum!

Isn’t that the way it is? Stop wanting the job, and it comes to you. Stop trying to lose the weight, and it melts off. We’re programmed to think that doing is the way to achieve. But really, we aren’t human doings, we are human beings. And when we just. . .get. . .happy, when we allow ourselves to float in that ocean of well-being, when we really believe with every atom of our body and soul that “everything always works out for me,” we give up our resistance, and it just flows in, as if by magic. Love, C

My two cents: give up, give in, get happy.

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Ahhh, letting go, giving  it up and then you get the prize?  Precisely, and since C and I are both doing the Abraham workshop thing this month, it’s all about Abe,  it is my favorite place to be, favorite thing to talk about.

It’s so funny, I literally just gave it up, I had written my part of our post and I just deleted it, let it go and am now re-writing it, I love how this stuff works.  I had gone through some stuff with a client, actually two clients last week and I was so irritated with our interaction that I had to write about it.  I knew that there was a lesson in it for me but I was irritated none the  less.  Anyway, as soon as I wrote it down and read it back to myself I was done with it, I was ready to let it go and I no longer felt the need to put it out there, to tell that story again, one more time for all to see.

This blog has been such a gift to me, even my massage therapist/energy worker/goddess says that this is the best thing I have ever done for myself regarding my healing/spiritual work.  There is something so magical about writing, I have to tell you, if you have never kept a journal or written in a diary, I highly recommend it.  I have made quantum leaps in my growth from just jotting down my thoughts and experiences on this blog, so amazing.

So, I  have been really working on letting things go this week,  funny how it works, C does a post on letting go, leaves it for me to do my bit on the topic and bam, before you know it, stuff I need to let go of appears for me to take care of and write about.   Seriously, I am the queen of letting go of things, getting rid of junk, I don’t have any kind or storage garage, and I never have, thank you very much, I travel light.  So for me to have stuff to let go of. . . well who am I kidding –don’t we all have stuff that we need to just let go of?

Since I am now re-writing this  today I am doing so after I just got back from seeing Abraham yesterday, and believe me  I learned so much  that there are many amazing, dazzling posts to come so stay tuned. . .but seriously, so much of what they were talking about was about letting go.  Just let it go, stop worrying, go to the beach if you feel the need but just let it go. Have faith and know everything  works out precisely the way it is supposed to.  xo–K

My two cents:   Drop the oars, and just allow the river to take you to wherever it is you are supposed to be, and have faith in knowing  that it is going to be really, really, good.

chasing approval

I just got back from an Abraham-Hicks workshop and I swear, I’m still dancing on clouds.  If you’re an Abraham fan, you know what I mean: Esther Hicks is a rock star! So anyway, I got there early because K and I have developed a plan for the Abraham show: get there early, stake out a good seat close enough to the front to have an unobstructed view of the unfolding program, dash out for a coffee or CD, return in time for the main event.

So I got there early, saved a seat, then went out to cruise the bookstore goodies before settling in. When I got back , I discovered someone in my chair. “Hey,” I said. You’re in my seat.” He’d even moved the bag I’d left to mark my spot.  Well, he swore it was his seat, even though when I staked it out, it was just a naked chair. Whatever. While he went into a long story about how his partner had saved the seat and had put a book down on one chair (not both, mind you) apologizing, justifying, etc., I could have got into it with him, but the room was starting to fill up now, and good spots were getting snapped up. I started looking for around. Hey! I’ve “saved” plenty of lecture seats, and never had one swiped out from under me and I wasn’t about to let it spoil the mood. And what do you know? There was a seat in the very next row, which I took. Meanwhile, the seat thief was trying to convince me to give him forgiveness, love and approval. Yeah, I wasn’t in the mood.

So it makes it even more interesting that my row-mate and I started talking about Byron Katie. I explained to her the situation at my work that had me off-center, and I was really glad to be at the workshop. She casually mentioned, “There are three things people chase and can never have if they are chasing them: love, appreciation, approval.” This really stopped me in my tracks.

Approval was what I was trying to elicit from my co-worker, and the more I tried to prove I was worth it, the more unwilling to give it he became.  In turn, I had done something similar to the seat thief.  A mistake was made, and even though he wasn’t about to give up his seat to me, he still kept talking, wanting my forgiveness, my approval. How many times have you known someone who had a difficult relationship with their mom or dad, and did everything they could, including building careers, having babies, chasing fame, just to please a parent who was never going to offer their approval, no matter what happened? They could spin on their head in a sequined tutu, and it would never be good enough. We’ve all known someone desperate for love: it puts off a vibe so unpleasant, it actually pushes people away. So sad! It all comes down to energy and what you will do to get it. Love, C

My two cents: approve of yourself; it’s all the approval you need!

♥♥♥

I talked to C when she returned from the Abraham workshop and she really was dancing on clouds.  If you have never been to a workshop I highly recommend it.  I am going to see them in SF next weekend and I can hardly wait, there really is nothing like it.  Being in a room with 400+ like-minded people is such a high.  It’s like having front row tickets to your favorite concert, the energy in the room is that big.

Approval has been something that has been coming up a lot lately. Why do we worry so much about what others think of us?  Does everyone really need to love us and think we are great?  Really?  Why do we go out of our minds when someone is mad at us?  Why do we feel the need to change someone’s mind if they don’t agree with us?  Does someone always have to be wrong so we can be right?  Just askin’. . . .

I used to be such a people pleaser, I really would be out of my mind if someone didn’t like me.  Not a healthy place to be.  I used to worry a lot, run conversations over and over in my head until I would come up with the perfect way to say something to someone where I could get my point across without giving them any reason to be mad at me.  And we all know how that goes, it’s nearly impossible.  If there was any way I could avoid confrontation, I would do it, even if it was detrimental to me.

I think things really started to change when I became a mother.  The only thing that really mattered to me was my daughter.  If I needed to stand up to a teacher or someone who had something to do with my kid, I had no problem doing it.  The more I practiced  the better I got at it.  It didn’t need to be dramatic, I just started to speak my peace without worrying what others thought of me.  Wow, it felt so good, I wondered, what took me so long to get to this place and what was I so afraid of?

I think growing up with a critical and judgmental parent has a big part in wanting approval, but like C said earlier, there are some people who are never going to approve of you.  I finally got that, as much as I hope people like me and think I am a good person.  I know that the only thing that is really important is that I live my life with integrity, do what I think is best for me and approve of myself. xo-K

My two cents:  There is no way you will ever get everyone’s approval, and even if you could it doesn’t matter.

liar liar pants on fire

Okay, so there I was, playing nice on a work project with a team, when I realized that one of the team members started giving off some really icky vibes. I didn’t say anything, just kept observing the individual. The weird vibe was consistent. Over time, I knew it was there, and then today: BAM, it all came to a head.

In a way, I was relieved, because it confirmed my intuitive hit: something was off. Now that I think about the situation, I know that there are several more element in play, even though he denies it. Before, I would have tried to engage him about what he was saying, even though I knew he declared I was wrong. Now, I know that there is more going on than meets the eye. I know that there is a nasty little piece of work in play, even though my colleague says there’s nothing more to it.

Oh, please, don’t think that I am all fluffy puppies and moonbeams about all this. Heck no! I got all up in my stuff about it, all defensive, all co-dependent. Sigh. In case you still think that things are just random and circumstances just “happen,” think again. Just as I am going through my little drama, guess who calls? K! So there I am, all off-center, off-balance, SO not in my goddess all-knowing. I needed to vent. And bless her, K listened. See, I so love her about this: sometimes she really calls me on my sh*t, knowing when I can handle it. But this time, she just listened and supported me, told me to stand firm, stand tall.  But most of all, she said, “that’s so 3D, such an illusion. Let’s just think about doing God’s work.” Wow: talk about a shift.

When I get all twisted up, Marianne Williamson has a prayer that gives me comfort and it goes like this: “Dear God, where would you have me serve?”  That pretty much takes the ego out of it, totally deflates the defensiveness. Where would YOU have me serve? Not my sad little ego, my wounded little self, but You who know all things and know better than me why this drama is rising up and grabbing my attention. Still haven’t worked that out yet, but I can tell you I stand in a place of power when I consider the players in this little drama, the hurtful things they say, and know exactly what they do not say.

People lie all the time, and they think no one knows. There is no angel standing by taking notes about our so-called sins, as I was taught in catechism class. No, it’s us. We know. We know when someone is lying to us, deceiving us, saying one thing and thinking another. We are all psychic. We know, if we are only willing to honor our knowing. Love, C

My two cents: Trust your gut. It is never wrong.

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Sometimes this work is just exhausting. . . grrr.  Sometimes it seems like there is no end to it, like what’s the point?  When do things start getting easy?

C texted me earlier today and was not in a good space, I called her a bit later, when I had a color processing  and  she filled me in on the jerk she was dealing with at her office .  She was frustrated, because someone who has no idea what she does or how good she is at her job with trying to tell her how she should be doing it his way and his way of course is better. NOT.  As much as she really didn’t want to hear it in that moment, I told her there was something in it for her.

Whenever something keeps coming up in a similar fashion, there is something we are not getting, and a lot of  times it has to do with us standing up for ourselves, and not going against our gut when we know we are right.  I told C about my experiences with clients who come in and try to tell me how to do my job.  I want my clients to be happy, and they get to pick whatever style or color they want.  I do give my opinion but ultimately it is their hair, their choice.  What they don’t get to pick is how I get the end result.  I am the expert I do things my way, period.  I have learned the hard way that when I let someone sway me to do thing against my better judgment and things don’t turn out well, they are not happy and neither am I.  Then on top of it, if I do what they want and it doesn’t turn out, who’s fault is it in the end? Mine of course.  Seriously?

I decided a few years ago, I have to do what I am good at, do what I think is right, and not let anyone, ever, make me doubt myself.  I am confident in my skills, and abilities and who I am as a person and I am always going to stand up for me.  As much as I would defend a friend, and have their back, I will have my own back.

I have learned to never go against what I believe in,  never let anyone change how I feel about myself as a person,  or change how I do things because I have fear that they won’t love me, approve of me or even that I will lose my job.   I will never again, second guess myself, sell myself short or let anyone’s opinion of me override my opinion of me.  That is my commitment to myself, and I know that if I can hold true to that, everything will just fall into place in my world.  xo-K

My two cents:  Nobody can do you as well as you can.  Remember that. . .everyday.